Seeking a Heart Like His - Through Prayer

For those of you who don’t know, I am currently doing a Beth Moore Bible study on David. This study is so rich and has prompted my thinking in so many ways about what it meant for David to be a man after God’s own heart and what it means to me to be a woman after God’s own heart.

Today’s passage (1 Samuel 22: 1-5) finds David running for his life from King Saul. David ends up in a dark and lonely cave. While there, David pours out his heart to God. His words are recorded in Psalm 142. Listen to some of his authentic prayer:

“I cry aloud to the Lord; I lift up my voice to the Lord for mercy. I pour out my complaint before Him; before Him, I tell my trouble. When my spirit grows faint within me, it is you who know my way… I cry to you, O Lord, I say, You are my refuge, my portion in the land of the living. Listen to my cry, for I am in desperate need; rescue me from those who pursue me, for they are too strong for me” (Psalm 142:1-3a, 5-6).

David here is young and afraid, leaving home behind, surrounded by discontents and people with their own problems. David appears to be at his wit’s end, maybe literally (see 1 Sam 21). But it is here that he opens his soul up to God, that he prays for refuge and safety, for a sense of God’s presence with him.

I love that we can come to God authentically like that, when we don’t know the answers, when we don’t know what to do, when we are weak and afraid and struggling to make sense of God’s will for our lives. David has been anointed king. He could never have imagined that great call would start out by running for his life from the existing king. He doesn’t know how God is going to work. He doesn’t know what is going to happen. So he does the only thing he knows to do – seek God. In 1 Samuel 22:3, David says that he needs to learn what God will do on his behalf.

Lately, in particular, I have been burdened so much for my grandmother and my family, hurting for them and with them, as my grandmother’s health deteriorates. It is physically and emotionally exhausting for all of us, even for me being far away. But Sunday as I came back in from church, I just sat down and prayed and poured my heart to God. Like David, I had felt completely overwhelmed, in need of refuge and peace.

It was so wonderful to be able to come before my Father, to let Him know my cares, to give Him my hurts and my fears, the questions and the anxiety. And as I laid it down at His feet, I sensed His presence and His peace all over again. I was reminded of His great love for us and His great provision. You see, He cares. In the midst of whatever is going on in our lives, He cares. He is Emmanuel, “God with us” – He knows our tears and our fears, our desires and our hopes. And He walks through it all with us.

I can't help but think that it in times like those, when we come to Him just as we are, seeking refuge in Him, that He reveals more of His heart to us, and more of His heart with us.

“Cast all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you.” - 1 Peter 5:7

“Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” – Matthew 11:28-30

Seeking a Heart Like His - Through Friendship

For those of you who don’t know, I am currently doing a Beth Moore Bible study on David. This study is so rich and has prompted my thinking in so many ways about what it meant for David to be a man after God’s own heart and what it means to me to be a woman after God’s own heart.

I alluded to friendship in my last post in the Heart Like His series, but I wanted to go back and revisit it. Friendship is a lost art in our society. In the age of social networking, we include hundreds, if not thousands in our “friend” list, and yet, research continues to show that the average person reports only having 1.5 close friends. Many people report having no close friends. Think about that, no one to confide in when things get tough, no one to walk by your side or share big news.

One of the toughest parts of moving for me is leaving my friends behind. I feel so greatly the loss of people that I have shared life with, that have walked through good times and bad times with me, that have opened up new worlds and new interests to me. And even when I know I will forge new friendships ahead, it is never easy to leave other ones behind.

There are those rare friendships, though, that transcend place and time – that become constant threads through different chapters of life. I’ve been fortunate to have more than 1.5 of those – friends that I can pray with, cry with, laugh with, celebrate with, share life with. Friends that are so refreshing and special and irreplaceable. They encourage me and challenge me and teach me and inspire me. And they make my life so much more than mediocre.

David & Jonathan in 1 Samuel 18 & 20 is a beautiful picture of that kind of friendship. It may seem odd at first that David and Jonathan became such fast friends. In the first encounter between them, Jonathan makes a covenant with David. Fast friends. If we look closer at their lives, we start to see all that they had in common, why their spirits were knit together so quickly. In 1 Samuel 14, Jonathan attacks the Philistines with his armor bearer and claims an important victory for Israel. Compare that scenario with David’s fight against Goliath (1 Samuel 17) and you will see that David and Jonathan had quite a bit in common – both stepped into battle courageously, both had faith that God would work on their behalf, neither was intimidated by the taunting of their enemies, and both inspired courage in others leading Israel to great victories.

Jonathan’s friendship proved invaluable to David, protecting him from Saul’s jealousy and allowing David to escape with his life. And David would never forget that – mourning over Jonathan’s death (2 Samuel 1) and providing for his family (2 Samuel 9). Some friendships are like that- they leave deep imprints on our hearts and change our lives forever.

I’m forever grateful for my forever friends.

“There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” – Proverbs 18:24
“A friend loves at all times and a brother is born for adversity.” – Proverbs 17:17

Seeking a Heart Like His - Through Love

My grandmother turns 87 on Wednesday. She went back to the hospital last night and is not doing well. It’s been a rough road over the last seven months, in and out of the hospital, in a long term care facility, having okay days and really bad days, battling bronchitis & pneumonia, stomach problems and any host of other issues.

It’s been so hard to walk through this time with my family, to love through the incredibly tough times. I have thought so many times about how much I want to be there by her side and just as many times about how grateful I am to be at a distance and to be protected in some ways from seeing her suffering up close and personal. Then I get mad at myself for feeling that way. I miss her so much and so wish I could be there to hold her hand, to sing songs with her, to pray with her, to sit with her when the loneliness sets in.

I was thinking that so much of love is not staying at a safe distance away, but choosing to be in the mix, choosing to walk with someone through the good times and the bad, in sickness and in health, through whatever comes. I have a lot to learn about that kind of love, the kind of love that steps into the fire with you and holds your hand through it all.

In seeking a heart like His, and in walking with my family through this time, I am learning more about what it means to love like that. I see my Mom by my grandmother’s side day-by-day. I see her love shine through even the toughest of days. It’s not easy and often exhausting, but she is there. What an incredible act of love that is!

There are so many different pictures of love in the story of David. We see the almost instant love between Jonathan & David (1 Samuel 18) – two men who had a common faith in God and a not-so-common blend of courage and humility. Then we see the false love of King Saul, who “loved” David because he made him feel good (1 Samuel 16:21-23). David’s music soothed his troubles. Saul’s love though would be as fleeting as a chapter, turning the page to hatred and jealousy (1 Samuel 18). Then Michal, Saul’s daughter loved David (18:28) – admired his valor and his victories, but not his passion for the Lord and the dancing in the streets (2 Samuel 6:12-16). Contrast that to David’s love for Abigail, based on her wisdom and grace in the way she intervened to prevent David from rash vengeance (25:32-40).

All these human relationships and the complexities of love remind me that even the strongest of human loves is imperfect and flawed. Even at our best, when we get it right, it still pales in comparison to God’s great love for us (Romans 8: 38-39). But I am not even close to getting it right. I read 1 Corinthians 13 and I realize how far I have to go to develop that patience and that kindness, that willingness to endure all things, and hope all things, that ability to forgive and to keep no record of wrongs, and yes, to stay in the mix and to suffer alongside.

God is teaching me what it means to love, in the most unlikely of ways. I have always loved my family and my grandmother – but my understanding of what that means is shifting and growing. I am learning how to live that love out practically day-by-day with those that mean the most to me. And in the process I am understanding new depths of His love for each of us.

Revisiting the Dating Fast

I am in the process of cleaning up my blog and tweaking the layout and look. Please be sure to let me know your thoughts on the changes.

As I was going through old blogs, I came across this list of themes and passages on dating that were part of The Dating Fast, my original blog series that I started many years ago. Since that time, I have revisited these verses many times, seeking His heart and His will for my life and giving Him my desires for a Godly husband. I have learned that I can trust Him with heart and with my future, whatever that holds.

Enduring Hardships
Hebrews 12: 7-13

The Inseparable Nature of God's Love
Romans 8: 35-39

Peace Without Bitterness
Hebrews 12: 14-17

Restoration/ Healing Fractures
Psalm 60: 1-3

Shaking the Dust Off
Matthew 10: 11-14

Hope for a Settled Future
1 Peter 5:10

An Invitation to Leave the Tent
Exodus 33: 7-11

Abundantly More
John 2: 1-5

Overcoming Fear
1 John 4:18

For Such a Time as This
Esther 4: 12-14

Noble Character
Ruth 3: 10-11

The Nature of Love
1 Corinthians 13

Treasure and the Heart
Matthew 6: 21

True Beauty
1 Peter 3: 2-4

A Prayer for Love
Philipians 1: 9-11

The Value of Two
Ecclesiastes 4: 9-12

Perseverance
Isaiah 40: 28-31

Stumbling Along the Way
Psalm 37: 23-24

Praying with Expectancy
Habakkuk 2:1

Seeing as God Sees
1 Samuel 16:7

Finding Favor
Exodus 33: 12-13

A New Creation
2 Corinthians 5:17

Abiding in Christ
John 15: 5-12

Sexual Purity
1 Corinthians 6: 18-20

Plans for Good
Jeremiah 29:11

Course Corrections

Most of the time I have a fairly good sense of direction, which is one reason I scoff at the idea of a GPS. Who needs satellite positioning and step by step directions when you have a map? Who needs “Sari” or any number of available GPS voices to walk you through the step by step process, when you know where you are going and a vague sense of how to get there? I am usually fairly confident that I can figure things out on my own. Sometimes, that confidence works out well, and sometimes, well let’s say I can hear the voice in my head saying “recalculating.” Sometimes, I have to admit, I do find myself on entirely the wrong road, or the right road heading in the opposite direction from where I need to be.

Am I alone here? Or can many of us sometime think we are on the right course, even when we are confidently heading in the wrong direction? Even when we don’t like to admit it, we sometimes need a “Sari” or someone to intervene and get our attention. We need someone to alert us that we are headed on the wrong path. We need someone to correct our course and to get us back on the right path to our destination.

The Tower of Babel is the story of God intervening and correcting the course of mankind. He needed to get their attention. God had instructed mankind from the very beginning, Genesis 1:28, to “Be fruitful and increase in number: fill the whole earth and subdue it.” Yet, in the story of Babel, the people have forgotten those words. Their goal is to isolate themselves, to build a wall around the city, to keep to themselves, to keep from being scattered all across the earth. God wanted them to fill the earth, and they wanted to keep from filling the earth and stay in their nice comfort zone with each other. You can almost hear them asking, Why do we need anyone else? Why do we need to go anywhere else? We have everything we need right here. Let’s stay here forever.

But that was never God’s design. God called Abram out of his country, Genesis 12; He sent Paul to the Gentiles throughout Asia, (Acts). He calls us to take His love to the nations, to go into Judea and Samaria and the uttermost parts of the earth (Acts 1:8). He calls us to follow Him, wherever He leads, whether here at home or far abroad, across town serving or across the world.

And in the story of Babel, when ALL the people unanimously decided they didn’t need to follow, that they needed to stay and make for themselves a name and a tower, they were heading in the wrong direction, directly away from what God had commanded. Stephen Covey says leaders make sure the ladders they are climbing are leaning against the right walls. And here, no one was leading, no one was asking if they were doing the right thing. No one was speaking up reminding them of God’s greater purpose and His will.

So, God intervened and got their attention. He sent them a much-needed course correction, to re-orient the whole group of them to His will. He scattered them across the earth. He put them exactly where He wanted them to be all along, all over the earth. I can imagine His voice, saying “recalculating.”
It’s similar to the story of Jonah. God called Jonah to go and preach to the city of Ninevah. Jonah didn’t want to go, so he headed in the opposite direction. But God is sovereign and He issues course corrections, as needed. He got Jonah’s attention and redirected his path. God used a whale and some fishermen to accomplish His will. And He put Jonah back on the path to Ninevah, where He wanted Jonah all along.

That can seem kind of harsh, if we just look at the surface. God is sovereign and He is going to accomplish His will regardless. But if we look at His will, we see it’s not harsh at all. It’s because of His great love for us that He guides us and corrects us. As a loving Father, He wants the best for us, even if that means disciplining us. He works all things out for good in our lives and like a good Father, He has good things in store. Sometimes that means keeping us from the danger of ourselves, and sometimes that means getting our attention when we are heading in the wrong direction. God had great plans for Jonah’s life – to use him to ignite a large revival and bring a whole people group back to God. God used Babel for good by placing people all over the earth. From the very beginning God’s design was for all the nations and all the earth to know Him, His truth and His great love. A message that we are never to forget (Deuteronomy 6:4-9) and one that Jesus would again command us to fulfill (Matthew 28:19-20).

God’s discipline is unpleasant at times, but I’m so glad that He is a loving Father that doesn’t allow us to continue down the wrong roads. I’m thankful for the course corrections in my life. They are proofs of a Father’s love and His master plan.

“Our Fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that that we may share in His holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it” (Hebrews 12: 10-11). Read another blog post on these verses here.

When has God corrected your course? In what ways has God’s discipline in your life brought a harvest of righteousness? Please share your comments and stories.

Seeking a Heart Like His

After finishing up the RuthSaga, it’s time to turn the page to the part of the legacy she left behind – the story of her grandson, David, who would become king of Israel and most importantly, a man after God’s own heart.

As I get ready to dive into David’s life, I want to keep asking that question – what made him a man after God’s own heart? He certainly wasn’t perfect – there are some pretty big moral failures in his life. He certainly had family issues and personal conflicts. But yet, there was something about his heart that stood the test of time, that saw him through the waiting to become king, the sin with Bathsheba, the trouble with his family. There was something about him, maybe about the way he tended his sheep, or the way he faced the “giants” in his life, something about the way he sought to honor God and humbled himself before Him. There was something different about this man.

Whatever that something different was, I want it. I want a heart like his. I want to be a woman after God’s heart, to live my life in a way that glorifies Him, that has the tenderness of a shepherd and the boldness of a warrior.

I think of the Brandon Heath song, “Give Me Your Eyes.” I’ve quoted it many times before as the prayer of my heart. Lord, give me your eyes for others. Give me a heart like yours. I want my desires to mirror yours. I want my life to be pleasing in your eyes. Teach me & show me.

What do you think it means to be a person after God’s heart? What does that look like for you? Share your thoughts and comments. And stay tuned for more as we delve into this study of David.