John 2:1-5
The story of Jesus turning the water into wine… We talked about this story yesterday in Sunday school, and it taught me something new about how to pray.
In the story, Mary comes to Jesus with a situation – a problem, not a solution, not a request, just a problem. She doesn’t state any desire of her own. She just shares her problem with Jesus and then lets go of it. Actually, she walks away, leaving it entirely in Jesus’ hands.
And Jesus responds, providing His solution to her problem – a solution that showed He cared, that glorified God, and that more than solved the problem. In fact, the solution He provided probably far exceeded anything Mary could have requested or imagined. He provided abundantly more.
So many times, I pray about my requests, bringing God my solutions to my problems and wanting Him to make them happen. Or I pray my desires, as if I know the best picture possible for my life and He just needs to allow it to happen. Praying that way, though, I miss out on the miracles that He wants to do in my life. I may miss out on the abundantly more that He wanted for me. It may lead me further away from God’s plan for my life. As I’ve pondered this passage yesterday and today, I have become more convinced that my way of praying doesn’t honor God and His sovereignty. It doesn’t acknowledge Him as Lord of my life and it doesn’t glorify Him.
During this journey, I want to be a blank slate before Him, giving Him my problems, my desires, and leaving them in His hands, letting Him answer as He wants, being able to walk away and leave my past, present, and future in His hands. Instead of requesting, I want to share, to lay my burdens at His feet and then wait on Him to answer, to guide, to lead in the way He chooses.
I want Him to be the one writing the script, not me. I don’t want His approval for my life, I want to sign on to His best that He already has planned for me. I have a feeling it will be abundantly more…
Monday, March 30, 2009
Friday, March 27, 2009
Day 7 - An Invitation to Go Deeper
Exodus 33: 7-11
The other week in our prayer group, we talked about this passage… and it has still been resonating in my heart.
The tent of meeting was set up outside the Israelite camp, as a place where anyone could go to meet with God. Anyone could go. It was an open invitation for all who wanted to know Him personally, anyone who wanted to inquire of the Lord.
Only Moses and Joshua went, though. The invitation was open to all, but the verses say these two were the ones that went. It says that the others would stand outside their tents and watch, from the sidelines. They would watch as God’s presence would visibly descend on the Tent of Meeting. They would stand and worship, but none of them chose to go to the tent themselves.
I wonder why. Why would they stay on the sidelines when they could see God and know Him more? Why would they hesitate to meet with God and to fellowship with Him?
Was it because they didn’t care? I don’t think so. They stood and watched. They cared about what was going on. They chose not to get involved. Maybe because going to the tent required leaving the safety of the camp behind. Maybe because it required connecting with God personally instead of relying on their leaders. Maybe because they were satisfied with what they already knew.
All these reasons sound familiar to me. They are all reasons/ excuses that I have used. It’s much easier to stay in camp, to be safe, than to dare to go deeper, to experience God personally. Experiencing God, though, takes risks, it involves hardship and leaving the familiar to trust Him day by day. But it also leads to joy and peace. Because he came and met with God, Moses had a friendship with God. God met with him, face to face; God spoke to Moses and revealed Himself to Moses in a special way… all because Moses dared to go deeper.
I don’t want to watch from the sidelines. I still want to go deeper with Him. I want to be His friend. I want Him to reveal Himself to me and to show me His will for my life.
The other week in our prayer group, we talked about this passage… and it has still been resonating in my heart.
The tent of meeting was set up outside the Israelite camp, as a place where anyone could go to meet with God. Anyone could go. It was an open invitation for all who wanted to know Him personally, anyone who wanted to inquire of the Lord.
Only Moses and Joshua went, though. The invitation was open to all, but the verses say these two were the ones that went. It says that the others would stand outside their tents and watch, from the sidelines. They would watch as God’s presence would visibly descend on the Tent of Meeting. They would stand and worship, but none of them chose to go to the tent themselves.
I wonder why. Why would they stay on the sidelines when they could see God and know Him more? Why would they hesitate to meet with God and to fellowship with Him?
Was it because they didn’t care? I don’t think so. They stood and watched. They cared about what was going on. They chose not to get involved. Maybe because going to the tent required leaving the safety of the camp behind. Maybe because it required connecting with God personally instead of relying on their leaders. Maybe because they were satisfied with what they already knew.
All these reasons sound familiar to me. They are all reasons/ excuses that I have used. It’s much easier to stay in camp, to be safe, than to dare to go deeper, to experience God personally. Experiencing God, though, takes risks, it involves hardship and leaving the familiar to trust Him day by day. But it also leads to joy and peace. Because he came and met with God, Moses had a friendship with God. God met with him, face to face; God spoke to Moses and revealed Himself to Moses in a special way… all because Moses dared to go deeper.
I don’t want to watch from the sidelines. I still want to go deeper with Him. I want to be His friend. I want Him to reveal Himself to me and to show me His will for my life.
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Day 5 - A Settled Future
1 Peter 5:10
I feel sad. I don’t know if I am ready to shake the dust off and close the door with finality. I haven't been ready to close that door yet. I need to, but I guess I still struggle with saying my final goodbye to that chapter in my life.
The last few weeks have been very unsettling, and honestly, they are just a small part of a much larger unsettled feeling in my life. Over the past five years, I have moved four times, been through several major job changes, gone back to graduate school, which was a huge transition in itself, and really created an upheaval in my life from who I was before. Change is not necessarily a bad thing, but I have had a lot of it over the last several years. And my life is getting ready to change again, in May, after I graduate. I’m not really sure what changes that will bring about, but I know I am excited about having free nights and weekends and the ability to get back involved in ministry.
Really, I yearn to be settled, to be in a place for more than a year, to have roots in the community, at church, at work. I want to know what it is like to have some stability, without getting bored and without getting complacent, but having some sense of being established. Some of my friends here in Columbia have been here for many years, and sometimes I’m jealous of that sense of shared history they have with others, walking through different life changes together, seeing each other grow, and helping each other. I crave that sometimes, and sometimes it seems so far from where I have been and where I am right now.
This verse in 1 Peter is one of my life verses. I cling to it in moments like this, when I feel unsettled, because it says that God has a plan, and He will ESTABLISH us, STRENGTHEN us, and SETTLE us. On the other side of the suffering and hardships and changes of life, God will bring us to a settled place in Him. I love that.
It reminds me of Abraham who set out on a journey to an unknown destination, and God led him through to bring him to a good and prosperous land that would be his for generations. Sometimes I feel like I am wandering aimlessly, taking my best guess at where God is leading, and trying to follow His path, but the truth is I have a hard time seeing the final destination. I have a hard time seeing where He is leading and which path I should choose. Instead, I have to trust Him day by day to show me the next steps along the way, seeking His wisdom and His guidance as I make decisions that can take me further on that journey and lead me to that place of peace and settledness in Him.
I feel sad. I don’t know if I am ready to shake the dust off and close the door with finality. I haven't been ready to close that door yet. I need to, but I guess I still struggle with saying my final goodbye to that chapter in my life.
The last few weeks have been very unsettling, and honestly, they are just a small part of a much larger unsettled feeling in my life. Over the past five years, I have moved four times, been through several major job changes, gone back to graduate school, which was a huge transition in itself, and really created an upheaval in my life from who I was before. Change is not necessarily a bad thing, but I have had a lot of it over the last several years. And my life is getting ready to change again, in May, after I graduate. I’m not really sure what changes that will bring about, but I know I am excited about having free nights and weekends and the ability to get back involved in ministry.
Really, I yearn to be settled, to be in a place for more than a year, to have roots in the community, at church, at work. I want to know what it is like to have some stability, without getting bored and without getting complacent, but having some sense of being established. Some of my friends here in Columbia have been here for many years, and sometimes I’m jealous of that sense of shared history they have with others, walking through different life changes together, seeing each other grow, and helping each other. I crave that sometimes, and sometimes it seems so far from where I have been and where I am right now.
This verse in 1 Peter is one of my life verses. I cling to it in moments like this, when I feel unsettled, because it says that God has a plan, and He will ESTABLISH us, STRENGTHEN us, and SETTLE us. On the other side of the suffering and hardships and changes of life, God will bring us to a settled place in Him. I love that.
It reminds me of Abraham who set out on a journey to an unknown destination, and God led him through to bring him to a good and prosperous land that would be his for generations. Sometimes I feel like I am wandering aimlessly, taking my best guess at where God is leading, and trying to follow His path, but the truth is I have a hard time seeing the final destination. I have a hard time seeing where He is leading and which path I should choose. Instead, I have to trust Him day by day to show me the next steps along the way, seeking His wisdom and His guidance as I make decisions that can take me further on that journey and lead me to that place of peace and settledness in Him.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Day 4 - Shaking Off the Dust
Matthew 10: 11-14
I appreciate everyone’s comments and messages about the entries so far. It helps to know that people are reading and that you are finding it encouraging. If you haven’t shared your thoughts with me yet, please do so. I would like to hear from you and to know what you think.
A couple of the comments that I have received have led to an interesting discussion about dating itself and how to go about pursuing God’s will.
I read this passage today, and I thought it was a good analogy for dating. It was certainly not written in the context of dating, but rather in commissioning the apostles for ministry. However, the steps that they were given seem to apply to the dating process as well.
- Search for a worthy person (v 11). Obviously a key component of dating is to find someone of solid character and spiritual maturity.
- Greet new opportunities (v 12) to get to know that person. My translation… Be open.
- Test it. It actually says, “If the house is deserving” (v 13). Find out if this person is God’s best for you. Find out if God is blessing it, and if the compatibility, the values, the growth is there. I think time and prayer are the only ways to determine the answer to this question.
- If it is, then let God’s peace rest in it (v 13). Enjoy it! Build that trust and intimacy that will prepare you for a covenant marriage.
- If/ when God stops blessing it, and peace departs from it, its time to leave (v 13).
Leaving is seldom easy, especially when it means walking away from something that once seemed like it had God’s blessing. But it doesn’t mean that the experience was a failure. It maybe means that God brought us together for a reason, that He did bless it, and then He was ready to move us on to another place, another situation, perhaps another relationship.
At first, I thought shaking off the dust was a harsh act of bitterness. Now, I don’t think it is. I see it more as a symbolic closing of one door, a cleansing act, so that we, I, can move on to the next place of ministry or growth or relationship that God has in store without looking back.
Monday, March 23, 2009
Day 3 - Restoration & Healing Fractures
Psalm 60
Sometimes I wonder about the scars from relationships. I worry about emotional baggage that may hinder future relationships. I wonder if some fractures can really be healed or if time just dulls the pain.
God, though, is the great healer. In these verses the psalmist cries out to Him because He is the one that can restore us (v 1); He is the one that mend the fractures (v 2) even when it seems like the earth is quaking beneath us. Broken hopes, broken hearts, broken trust… God can heal all of those in us. He is in the restoration business. “With God, we will gain the victory.” (v12).
I was talking to one of my friends tonight, and she told me that it is impossible to break a bone in the exact same place twice. A doctor told her that after she broke her arm twice in nearly the same spot. As she remembers it (and we haven’t verified the medical veracity of this) the doctor told her that breaks never happen along a previous break. It is as if the new bone growth from the healing process gives that section of bone a new strength that makes it much less susceptible to breaking.
I like that picture. Maybe when we have scars, God applies His special healing that mends the hurt and through that healing process God restores us in ways that give us new wisdom, strength, and grace for all that lies ahead, that enable us to continue to be open to new relationships and at the same time stronger than we were before.
Sometimes I wonder about the scars from relationships. I worry about emotional baggage that may hinder future relationships. I wonder if some fractures can really be healed or if time just dulls the pain.
God, though, is the great healer. In these verses the psalmist cries out to Him because He is the one that can restore us (v 1); He is the one that mend the fractures (v 2) even when it seems like the earth is quaking beneath us. Broken hopes, broken hearts, broken trust… God can heal all of those in us. He is in the restoration business. “With God, we will gain the victory.” (v12).
I was talking to one of my friends tonight, and she told me that it is impossible to break a bone in the exact same place twice. A doctor told her that after she broke her arm twice in nearly the same spot. As she remembers it (and we haven’t verified the medical veracity of this) the doctor told her that breaks never happen along a previous break. It is as if the new bone growth from the healing process gives that section of bone a new strength that makes it much less susceptible to breaking.
I like that picture. Maybe when we have scars, God applies His special healing that mends the hurt and through that healing process God restores us in ways that give us new wisdom, strength, and grace for all that lies ahead, that enable us to continue to be open to new relationships and at the same time stronger than we were before.
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