Adapted from Little Gretel and the Wooden Shoe by Elizabeth Harrison
View Original Version here
Once upon a time in a far away land, lived a little boy named Wolff. The name didn’t fit the boy at all, as he was as gentle as a lamb, a good-natured lad with a caring and generous spirit about him. But, both of his parents died unexpectedly when he was a toddler, and he was forced to go live with his evil Aunt May.
Evil Aunt May hadn’t always been evil. She used to be a fun-loving generous person herself. But after her husband died, her love of life did too, and she wore her misery in a wrap of bitterness and hatred. The last thing she wanted was to take in this young boy – how would she support him? He always pestered her with questions and more than once she had to yell at him about poking his nose in where it didn’t belong. One time she caught him with a quarter in his hand. He wanted to buy a piece of candy with it. “Give that to me,” she yelled. “That’s money to go in the bank. How do you think I feed you?”
The truth was she had money. The problem was she never felt she had enough. She was quite wealthy compared to most people in that day, but she would hear none of it. She was a stingy mean old miser who wouldn’t spend a dime if it wasn’t absolutely necessary. And necessary had to fit a her definition.
The one luxury that she allowed Wolff was to go to a private school. Even that, wasn’t for his benefit or because he deserved it. She just wanted to ensure that she wouldn’t have to support him forever, so she wanted to make sure he could get a job, even better if he could get a wealthy benefactor to take notice of him and take him off her hands for good.
So, little boy Wolff, excited and terrified about starting at this new school, wondered what it would be like. Would the other kids like him? Would he make friends? He heard rumors of sports – maybe they would let him play. He had always been forbidden before, but maybe now. Maybe.
On his first day of school, his excitement turned to embarrassment as he saw all of his classmates in new clothes. He stood out something awful in his old rags. But Aunt May wouldn’t buy him any new clothes. She would hear none of it. She said she was already investing too much money in him. His classmates stared at him something odd, like he really didn’t fit in. But young Wolff smiled anyway and decided they would probably warm up to him. They never did, but young Wolff never stopped trying.
Now way back then, children didn’t hang stockings at Christmas. Instead they put out their shoes, in hopes that Santa would fill them with goodies. This year, young Wolff was hoping that Santa would give him a new scarf. His had holes in it and had unraveled. His ears froze on the walk to school and the wind sent chills down his spine. A new scarf, maybe Santa would bring him one. One particularly cold day, he was feeling brave and asked Aunt May. “A scarf? Do you know how much a scarf costs? Do you know how much money I have already spent taking care of you all these years. And how much did your parents leave for your care? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. So what do I have for you? Nothing. Absolutely nothing, you selfish child.”
Young Wolff hadn’t meant to upset her. He felt bad for the trouble he caused. But maybe Santa would bring him a scarf and his ears could be warm.
As the Christmas season approached, the schoolmeister announced a field trip. The class would walk to the nearby church for a special Christmas service. Young Wolff was so excited – he could hardly wait to hear the Christmas music and see the nativity scene. He had never been to a Christmas service before. Aunt May didn’t want anything to do with church or God or Christmas or any of it.
As the time came for the service, the boys all lined up and had on their big coats and warm scarves and gloves. They were bundled from head to toe for the walk to the church. Young Wolff had on his same clothes and the coat he outgrew two years ago, the unraveling scarf that didn’t do its job and no gloves. He knew he was going to be cold, but it’s all he had. It didn’t matter though to him. Nothing could dampen his joy at getting to go, not Aunt May, not the boys in his class, not anyone.
The music was even more beautiful than he had imagined it. And the story of Jesus’ birth, it mesmerized the young Wolff. He couldn’t stop thinking about this young baby in a manger and how cold he must have been. “Was this baby really God?” As they left the church, they stopped by the nativity. And here the story came even more to life.
His daydreams came to a quick halt when he heard his classmates laughing and turned to see what was going on. He saw them teasing a young boy, not more than 5, that was out alone in the cold. It didn’t take long to see this boy was far from home and had no food, no money, no clothes. Feeling sorry for the boy, he told his classmates to leave him alone. He smiled and the boy smiled back. A friendly face. But the boy had to be cold. Young Wolff took off his coat and gave it to the boy. He knew Aunt May would be furious, but he couldn’t leave him like that. Maybe Santa would bring him a scarf too, maybe. But wait, he doesn’t have a shoe to put out. “How can Santa give him a scarf without a shoe?” So young Wolff took off his right shoe, too. He just had to give it to the boy. That way, Santa could bring him good gifts too, and he needed it more than I did, said Wolff.
Wolff walked back home, hobbling on one foot, shivering without a good scarf and now without a coat. Aunt May saw him out the window and opened the door quick. “What have you done, stupid boy? Where is your coat and where is your shoe? Get in here by the fire before you die and I have to pay for your funeral too.” Young Wolff was so grateful to warm himself by the fire he didn’t mind the yelling. And he couldn’t lie. He told Aunt May the truth and prepared to take his beating. And it surely came. He cried himself to sleep that night with bruises on his backside and in his heart.
At least he had remembered to set out the shoe. Santa was probably mad at him too, but he had to take a chance. Surprisingly Aunt May left it out too. She had told him Santa would come and fill it with coal.
The next morning, though, the bitterness of the night dampened by a good night’s sleep, the boy got up and snuck downstairs, anxious to see if Santa had answered his request. He could hardly believe his eyes – there by the fireplace were both of his shoes, a new warm coat and a scarf and some candy too. There were gifts all around, more than he had ever seen, some gloves and some marbles and several other games.
Aunt May got up, hearing the commotion, and wondered out front. She stood there confused by the gifts galore. “What on earth? Who paid for all this?” Young Wolff exclaimed – It’s from Santa. I knew he would come through.
As they wondered to town, they heard rumors all around, of boys who had nothing in their shoes but coal or sand.
They wondered back to the church where young Wolff had been the night before. The priest was out front and asked him what he had found. “You won’t believe it, sir, Santa brought me all these gifts – a coat and a scarf and candy, going down the list.” This is the best Christmas ever.
The priest winked and said, “You know my child, I saw you last night, give all you had. I saw you reach out and love in way not many do. Your classmates only laughed but you saw and you cared. You gave a smile, a coat and much more. The gifts you found are not from Santa, dear one, they are gifts from the One you reached out and touched. They are gifts not from Santa for those who are good, they are the good gifts from the One sent to love from above.”
I first shared this version of this Christmas story at Baylor Orator Toastmasters as part of the advanced manual on storytelling. For more information on Toastmasters, visit the Baylor Orators website.
Friday, December 9, 2011
Sunday, December 4, 2011
Seeking a Heart Like His - Through Waiting
For those of you who don’t know, I am currently doing a Beth Moore Bible study on David. This study is so rich and has prompted my thinking in so many ways about what it meant for David to be a man after God’s own heart and what it means to me to be a woman after God’s own heart.
What must it be like to have a clear sense of where God is calling you and who he is calling you to be, only to be told, not yet? That is where David finds himself in this week’s passage (1 Samuel 21 - 24). He has been anointed as king-to-be (ch 16). He has won a great victory over Goliath (ch 17). He has become famous throughout Israel, married the king’s daughter, taken on a prestigious position in the king’s court (ch 18). It looks like this is going to happen, that he is going to be king and the pieces are all coming together. But they aren’t. He has made this great climb up the ladder from unknown shepherd to famous warrior, but Saul is still king. Instead of preparing his future successor, Saul is trying to kill David. Instead of learning the ropes and building his future administration, David is running for his life and hiding in caves, leaving his family and friends behind, seeking refuge in enemy territory, crying out to God for help (ch 21-24).
So close, and yet so far away. And yet, David doesn’t rush God. As Saul is tracking David down, David even has the chance to take Saul’s life – to hurry things along, to speed up this process. But he doesn’t. David couldn’t have taken a shortcut to the throne. His men urged him on, and yet, David is resolute. David chooses to wait on the Lord – “Who am I to raise a hand against the Lord’s anointed?”
Wow! I wish I could rest in God like that. I am queen of second-guessing. Even when I feel like I have clear direction from God, I get anxious in the waiting wondering if I am doing enough, wondering what I need to do, wondering when things are going to fall into place. I still feel somehow it is up to me, even when it clearly is not. God is sovereign. He is the one that calls us, equips us, and uses us. He is the one that works all things out for good to those that love Him and are called to His purposes (Romans 8:28). That doesn’t always happen on our timetables, but we can rest in the waiting, knowing He is at work.
I can’t help but think of the song, “While I’m Waiting” by John Waller. Hopefully it will encourage you as much as it has encouraged me during those times of waiting.
“I'm waiting, I'm waiting on You Lord
And I am hopeful, I'm waiting on You Lord
Though it is painful, but patiently I will wait
And I will move ahead bold and confident
Taking every step in obedience
While I'm waiting I will serve You
While I'm waiting I will worship
While I'm waiting I will not faint
I'll be running the race even while I wait
I'm waiting, I'm waiting on You Lord
And I am peaceful, I'm waiting on You Lord
Though it's not easy no, but faithfully I will wait
YES, I WILL WAIT…” [emphasis mine]
What must it be like to have a clear sense of where God is calling you and who he is calling you to be, only to be told, not yet? That is where David finds himself in this week’s passage (1 Samuel 21 - 24). He has been anointed as king-to-be (ch 16). He has won a great victory over Goliath (ch 17). He has become famous throughout Israel, married the king’s daughter, taken on a prestigious position in the king’s court (ch 18). It looks like this is going to happen, that he is going to be king and the pieces are all coming together. But they aren’t. He has made this great climb up the ladder from unknown shepherd to famous warrior, but Saul is still king. Instead of preparing his future successor, Saul is trying to kill David. Instead of learning the ropes and building his future administration, David is running for his life and hiding in caves, leaving his family and friends behind, seeking refuge in enemy territory, crying out to God for help (ch 21-24).
So close, and yet so far away. And yet, David doesn’t rush God. As Saul is tracking David down, David even has the chance to take Saul’s life – to hurry things along, to speed up this process. But he doesn’t. David couldn’t have taken a shortcut to the throne. His men urged him on, and yet, David is resolute. David chooses to wait on the Lord – “Who am I to raise a hand against the Lord’s anointed?”
Wow! I wish I could rest in God like that. I am queen of second-guessing. Even when I feel like I have clear direction from God, I get anxious in the waiting wondering if I am doing enough, wondering what I need to do, wondering when things are going to fall into place. I still feel somehow it is up to me, even when it clearly is not. God is sovereign. He is the one that calls us, equips us, and uses us. He is the one that works all things out for good to those that love Him and are called to His purposes (Romans 8:28). That doesn’t always happen on our timetables, but we can rest in the waiting, knowing He is at work.
I can’t help but think of the song, “While I’m Waiting” by John Waller. Hopefully it will encourage you as much as it has encouraged me during those times of waiting.
“I'm waiting, I'm waiting on You Lord
And I am hopeful, I'm waiting on You Lord
Though it is painful, but patiently I will wait
And I will move ahead bold and confident
Taking every step in obedience
While I'm waiting I will serve You
While I'm waiting I will worship
While I'm waiting I will not faint
I'll be running the race even while I wait
I'm waiting, I'm waiting on You Lord
And I am peaceful, I'm waiting on You Lord
Though it's not easy no, but faithfully I will wait
YES, I WILL WAIT…” [emphasis mine]
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Seeking a Heart Like His - Through Prayer
For those of you who don’t know, I am currently doing a Beth Moore Bible study on David. This study is so rich and has prompted my thinking in so many ways about what it meant for David to be a man after God’s own heart and what it means to me to be a woman after God’s own heart.
Today’s passage (1 Samuel 22: 1-5) finds David running for his life from King Saul. David ends up in a dark and lonely cave. While there, David pours out his heart to God. His words are recorded in Psalm 142. Listen to some of his authentic prayer:
“I cry aloud to the Lord; I lift up my voice to the Lord for mercy. I pour out my complaint before Him; before Him, I tell my trouble. When my spirit grows faint within me, it is you who know my way… I cry to you, O Lord, I say, You are my refuge, my portion in the land of the living. Listen to my cry, for I am in desperate need; rescue me from those who pursue me, for they are too strong for me” (Psalm 142:1-3a, 5-6).
David here is young and afraid, leaving home behind, surrounded by discontents and people with their own problems. David appears to be at his wit’s end, maybe literally (see 1 Sam 21). But it is here that he opens his soul up to God, that he prays for refuge and safety, for a sense of God’s presence with him.
I love that we can come to God authentically like that, when we don’t know the answers, when we don’t know what to do, when we are weak and afraid and struggling to make sense of God’s will for our lives. David has been anointed king. He could never have imagined that great call would start out by running for his life from the existing king. He doesn’t know how God is going to work. He doesn’t know what is going to happen. So he does the only thing he knows to do – seek God. In 1 Samuel 22:3, David says that he needs to learn what God will do on his behalf.
Lately, in particular, I have been burdened so much for my grandmother and my family, hurting for them and with them, as my grandmother’s health deteriorates. It is physically and emotionally exhausting for all of us, even for me being far away. But Sunday as I came back in from church, I just sat down and prayed and poured my heart to God. Like David, I had felt completely overwhelmed, in need of refuge and peace.
It was so wonderful to be able to come before my Father, to let Him know my cares, to give Him my hurts and my fears, the questions and the anxiety. And as I laid it down at His feet, I sensed His presence and His peace all over again. I was reminded of His great love for us and His great provision. You see, He cares. In the midst of whatever is going on in our lives, He cares. He is Emmanuel, “God with us” – He knows our tears and our fears, our desires and our hopes. And He walks through it all with us.
I can't help but think that it in times like those, when we come to Him just as we are, seeking refuge in Him, that He reveals more of His heart to us, and more of His heart with us.
“Cast all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you.” - 1 Peter 5:7
“Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” – Matthew 11:28-30
Today’s passage (1 Samuel 22: 1-5) finds David running for his life from King Saul. David ends up in a dark and lonely cave. While there, David pours out his heart to God. His words are recorded in Psalm 142. Listen to some of his authentic prayer:
“I cry aloud to the Lord; I lift up my voice to the Lord for mercy. I pour out my complaint before Him; before Him, I tell my trouble. When my spirit grows faint within me, it is you who know my way… I cry to you, O Lord, I say, You are my refuge, my portion in the land of the living. Listen to my cry, for I am in desperate need; rescue me from those who pursue me, for they are too strong for me” (Psalm 142:1-3a, 5-6).
David here is young and afraid, leaving home behind, surrounded by discontents and people with their own problems. David appears to be at his wit’s end, maybe literally (see 1 Sam 21). But it is here that he opens his soul up to God, that he prays for refuge and safety, for a sense of God’s presence with him.
I love that we can come to God authentically like that, when we don’t know the answers, when we don’t know what to do, when we are weak and afraid and struggling to make sense of God’s will for our lives. David has been anointed king. He could never have imagined that great call would start out by running for his life from the existing king. He doesn’t know how God is going to work. He doesn’t know what is going to happen. So he does the only thing he knows to do – seek God. In 1 Samuel 22:3, David says that he needs to learn what God will do on his behalf.
Lately, in particular, I have been burdened so much for my grandmother and my family, hurting for them and with them, as my grandmother’s health deteriorates. It is physically and emotionally exhausting for all of us, even for me being far away. But Sunday as I came back in from church, I just sat down and prayed and poured my heart to God. Like David, I had felt completely overwhelmed, in need of refuge and peace.
It was so wonderful to be able to come before my Father, to let Him know my cares, to give Him my hurts and my fears, the questions and the anxiety. And as I laid it down at His feet, I sensed His presence and His peace all over again. I was reminded of His great love for us and His great provision. You see, He cares. In the midst of whatever is going on in our lives, He cares. He is Emmanuel, “God with us” – He knows our tears and our fears, our desires and our hopes. And He walks through it all with us.
I can't help but think that it in times like those, when we come to Him just as we are, seeking refuge in Him, that He reveals more of His heart to us, and more of His heart with us.
“Cast all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you.” - 1 Peter 5:7
“Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” – Matthew 11:28-30
Friday, November 18, 2011
Seeking a Heart Like His - Through Friendship
For those of you who don’t know, I am currently doing a Beth Moore Bible study on David. This study is so rich and has prompted my thinking in so many ways about what it meant for David to be a man after God’s own heart and what it means to me to be a woman after God’s own heart.
I alluded to friendship in my last post in the Heart Like His series, but I wanted to go back and revisit it. Friendship is a lost art in our society. In the age of social networking, we include hundreds, if not thousands in our “friend” list, and yet, research continues to show that the average person reports only having 1.5 close friends. Many people report having no close friends. Think about that, no one to confide in when things get tough, no one to walk by your side or share big news.
One of the toughest parts of moving for me is leaving my friends behind. I feel so greatly the loss of people that I have shared life with, that have walked through good times and bad times with me, that have opened up new worlds and new interests to me. And even when I know I will forge new friendships ahead, it is never easy to leave other ones behind.
There are those rare friendships, though, that transcend place and time – that become constant threads through different chapters of life. I’ve been fortunate to have more than 1.5 of those – friends that I can pray with, cry with, laugh with, celebrate with, share life with. Friends that are so refreshing and special and irreplaceable. They encourage me and challenge me and teach me and inspire me. And they make my life so much more than mediocre.
David & Jonathan in 1 Samuel 18 & 20 is a beautiful picture of that kind of friendship. It may seem odd at first that David and Jonathan became such fast friends. In the first encounter between them, Jonathan makes a covenant with David. Fast friends. If we look closer at their lives, we start to see all that they had in common, why their spirits were knit together so quickly. In 1 Samuel 14, Jonathan attacks the Philistines with his armor bearer and claims an important victory for Israel. Compare that scenario with David’s fight against Goliath (1 Samuel 17) and you will see that David and Jonathan had quite a bit in common – both stepped into battle courageously, both had faith that God would work on their behalf, neither was intimidated by the taunting of their enemies, and both inspired courage in others leading Israel to great victories.
Jonathan’s friendship proved invaluable to David, protecting him from Saul’s jealousy and allowing David to escape with his life. And David would never forget that – mourning over Jonathan’s death (2 Samuel 1) and providing for his family (2 Samuel 9). Some friendships are like that- they leave deep imprints on our hearts and change our lives forever.
I’m forever grateful for my forever friends.
“There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” – Proverbs 18:24
“A friend loves at all times and a brother is born for adversity.” – Proverbs 17:17
I alluded to friendship in my last post in the Heart Like His series, but I wanted to go back and revisit it. Friendship is a lost art in our society. In the age of social networking, we include hundreds, if not thousands in our “friend” list, and yet, research continues to show that the average person reports only having 1.5 close friends. Many people report having no close friends. Think about that, no one to confide in when things get tough, no one to walk by your side or share big news.
One of the toughest parts of moving for me is leaving my friends behind. I feel so greatly the loss of people that I have shared life with, that have walked through good times and bad times with me, that have opened up new worlds and new interests to me. And even when I know I will forge new friendships ahead, it is never easy to leave other ones behind.
There are those rare friendships, though, that transcend place and time – that become constant threads through different chapters of life. I’ve been fortunate to have more than 1.5 of those – friends that I can pray with, cry with, laugh with, celebrate with, share life with. Friends that are so refreshing and special and irreplaceable. They encourage me and challenge me and teach me and inspire me. And they make my life so much more than mediocre.
David & Jonathan in 1 Samuel 18 & 20 is a beautiful picture of that kind of friendship. It may seem odd at first that David and Jonathan became such fast friends. In the first encounter between them, Jonathan makes a covenant with David. Fast friends. If we look closer at their lives, we start to see all that they had in common, why their spirits were knit together so quickly. In 1 Samuel 14, Jonathan attacks the Philistines with his armor bearer and claims an important victory for Israel. Compare that scenario with David’s fight against Goliath (1 Samuel 17) and you will see that David and Jonathan had quite a bit in common – both stepped into battle courageously, both had faith that God would work on their behalf, neither was intimidated by the taunting of their enemies, and both inspired courage in others leading Israel to great victories.
Jonathan’s friendship proved invaluable to David, protecting him from Saul’s jealousy and allowing David to escape with his life. And David would never forget that – mourning over Jonathan’s death (2 Samuel 1) and providing for his family (2 Samuel 9). Some friendships are like that- they leave deep imprints on our hearts and change our lives forever.
I’m forever grateful for my forever friends.
“There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” – Proverbs 18:24
“A friend loves at all times and a brother is born for adversity.” – Proverbs 17:17
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Seeking a Heart Like His - Through Love
My grandmother turns 87 on Wednesday. She went back to the hospital last night and is not doing well. It’s been a rough road over the last seven months, in and out of the hospital, in a long term care facility, having okay days and really bad days, battling bronchitis & pneumonia, stomach problems and any host of other issues.
It’s been so hard to walk through this time with my family, to love through the incredibly tough times. I have thought so many times about how much I want to be there by her side and just as many times about how grateful I am to be at a distance and to be protected in some ways from seeing her suffering up close and personal. Then I get mad at myself for feeling that way. I miss her so much and so wish I could be there to hold her hand, to sing songs with her, to pray with her, to sit with her when the loneliness sets in.
I was thinking that so much of love is not staying at a safe distance away, but choosing to be in the mix, choosing to walk with someone through the good times and the bad, in sickness and in health, through whatever comes. I have a lot to learn about that kind of love, the kind of love that steps into the fire with you and holds your hand through it all.
In seeking a heart like His, and in walking with my family through this time, I am learning more about what it means to love like that. I see my Mom by my grandmother’s side day-by-day. I see her love shine through even the toughest of days. It’s not easy and often exhausting, but she is there. What an incredible act of love that is!
There are so many different pictures of love in the story of David. We see the almost instant love between Jonathan & David (1 Samuel 18) – two men who had a common faith in God and a not-so-common blend of courage and humility. Then we see the false love of King Saul, who “loved” David because he made him feel good (1 Samuel 16:21-23). David’s music soothed his troubles. Saul’s love though would be as fleeting as a chapter, turning the page to hatred and jealousy (1 Samuel 18). Then Michal, Saul’s daughter loved David (18:28) – admired his valor and his victories, but not his passion for the Lord and the dancing in the streets (2 Samuel 6:12-16). Contrast that to David’s love for Abigail, based on her wisdom and grace in the way she intervened to prevent David from rash vengeance (25:32-40).
All these human relationships and the complexities of love remind me that even the strongest of human loves is imperfect and flawed. Even at our best, when we get it right, it still pales in comparison to God’s great love for us (Romans 8: 38-39). But I am not even close to getting it right. I read 1 Corinthians 13 and I realize how far I have to go to develop that patience and that kindness, that willingness to endure all things, and hope all things, that ability to forgive and to keep no record of wrongs, and yes, to stay in the mix and to suffer alongside.
God is teaching me what it means to love, in the most unlikely of ways. I have always loved my family and my grandmother – but my understanding of what that means is shifting and growing. I am learning how to live that love out practically day-by-day with those that mean the most to me. And in the process I am understanding new depths of His love for each of us.
It’s been so hard to walk through this time with my family, to love through the incredibly tough times. I have thought so many times about how much I want to be there by her side and just as many times about how grateful I am to be at a distance and to be protected in some ways from seeing her suffering up close and personal. Then I get mad at myself for feeling that way. I miss her so much and so wish I could be there to hold her hand, to sing songs with her, to pray with her, to sit with her when the loneliness sets in.
I was thinking that so much of love is not staying at a safe distance away, but choosing to be in the mix, choosing to walk with someone through the good times and the bad, in sickness and in health, through whatever comes. I have a lot to learn about that kind of love, the kind of love that steps into the fire with you and holds your hand through it all.
In seeking a heart like His, and in walking with my family through this time, I am learning more about what it means to love like that. I see my Mom by my grandmother’s side day-by-day. I see her love shine through even the toughest of days. It’s not easy and often exhausting, but she is there. What an incredible act of love that is!
There are so many different pictures of love in the story of David. We see the almost instant love between Jonathan & David (1 Samuel 18) – two men who had a common faith in God and a not-so-common blend of courage and humility. Then we see the false love of King Saul, who “loved” David because he made him feel good (1 Samuel 16:21-23). David’s music soothed his troubles. Saul’s love though would be as fleeting as a chapter, turning the page to hatred and jealousy (1 Samuel 18). Then Michal, Saul’s daughter loved David (18:28) – admired his valor and his victories, but not his passion for the Lord and the dancing in the streets (2 Samuel 6:12-16). Contrast that to David’s love for Abigail, based on her wisdom and grace in the way she intervened to prevent David from rash vengeance (25:32-40).
All these human relationships and the complexities of love remind me that even the strongest of human loves is imperfect and flawed. Even at our best, when we get it right, it still pales in comparison to God’s great love for us (Romans 8: 38-39). But I am not even close to getting it right. I read 1 Corinthians 13 and I realize how far I have to go to develop that patience and that kindness, that willingness to endure all things, and hope all things, that ability to forgive and to keep no record of wrongs, and yes, to stay in the mix and to suffer alongside.
God is teaching me what it means to love, in the most unlikely of ways. I have always loved my family and my grandmother – but my understanding of what that means is shifting and growing. I am learning how to live that love out practically day-by-day with those that mean the most to me. And in the process I am understanding new depths of His love for each of us.
Revisiting the Dating Fast
I am in the process of cleaning up my blog and tweaking the layout and look. Please be sure to let me know your thoughts on the changes.
As I was going through old blogs, I came across this list of themes and passages on dating that were part of The Dating Fast, my original blog series that I started many years ago. Since that time, I have revisited these verses many times, seeking His heart and His will for my life and giving Him my desires for a Godly husband. I have learned that I can trust Him with heart and with my future, whatever that holds.
Enduring Hardships
Hebrews 12: 7-13
The Inseparable Nature of God's Love
Romans 8: 35-39
Peace Without Bitterness
Hebrews 12: 14-17
Restoration/ Healing Fractures
Psalm 60: 1-3
Shaking the Dust Off
Matthew 10: 11-14
Hope for a Settled Future
1 Peter 5:10
An Invitation to Leave the Tent
Exodus 33: 7-11
Abundantly More
John 2: 1-5
Overcoming Fear
1 John 4:18
For Such a Time as This
Esther 4: 12-14
Noble Character
Ruth 3: 10-11
The Nature of Love
1 Corinthians 13
Treasure and the Heart
Matthew 6: 21
True Beauty
1 Peter 3: 2-4
A Prayer for Love
Philipians 1: 9-11
The Value of Two
Ecclesiastes 4: 9-12
Perseverance
Isaiah 40: 28-31
Stumbling Along the Way
Psalm 37: 23-24
Praying with Expectancy
Habakkuk 2:1
Seeing as God Sees
1 Samuel 16:7
Finding Favor
Exodus 33: 12-13
A New Creation
2 Corinthians 5:17
Abiding in Christ
John 15: 5-12
Sexual Purity
1 Corinthians 6: 18-20
Plans for Good
Jeremiah 29:11
As I was going through old blogs, I came across this list of themes and passages on dating that were part of The Dating Fast, my original blog series that I started many years ago. Since that time, I have revisited these verses many times, seeking His heart and His will for my life and giving Him my desires for a Godly husband. I have learned that I can trust Him with heart and with my future, whatever that holds.
Enduring Hardships
Hebrews 12: 7-13
The Inseparable Nature of God's Love
Romans 8: 35-39
Peace Without Bitterness
Hebrews 12: 14-17
Restoration/ Healing Fractures
Psalm 60: 1-3
Shaking the Dust Off
Matthew 10: 11-14
Hope for a Settled Future
1 Peter 5:10
An Invitation to Leave the Tent
Exodus 33: 7-11
Abundantly More
John 2: 1-5
Overcoming Fear
1 John 4:18
For Such a Time as This
Esther 4: 12-14
Noble Character
Ruth 3: 10-11
The Nature of Love
1 Corinthians 13
Treasure and the Heart
Matthew 6: 21
True Beauty
1 Peter 3: 2-4
A Prayer for Love
Philipians 1: 9-11
The Value of Two
Ecclesiastes 4: 9-12
Perseverance
Isaiah 40: 28-31
Stumbling Along the Way
Psalm 37: 23-24
Praying with Expectancy
Habakkuk 2:1
Seeing as God Sees
1 Samuel 16:7
Finding Favor
Exodus 33: 12-13
A New Creation
2 Corinthians 5:17
Abiding in Christ
John 15: 5-12
Sexual Purity
1 Corinthians 6: 18-20
Plans for Good
Jeremiah 29:11
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Course Corrections
Most of the time I have a fairly good sense of direction, which is one reason I scoff at the idea of a GPS. Who needs satellite positioning and step by step directions when you have a map? Who needs “Sari” or any number of available GPS voices to walk you through the step by step process, when you know where you are going and a vague sense of how to get there? I am usually fairly confident that I can figure things out on my own. Sometimes, that confidence works out well, and sometimes, well let’s say I can hear the voice in my head saying “recalculating.” Sometimes, I have to admit, I do find myself on entirely the wrong road, or the right road heading in the opposite direction from where I need to be.
Am I alone here? Or can many of us sometime think we are on the right course, even when we are confidently heading in the wrong direction? Even when we don’t like to admit it, we sometimes need a “Sari” or someone to intervene and get our attention. We need someone to alert us that we are headed on the wrong path. We need someone to correct our course and to get us back on the right path to our destination.
The Tower of Babel is the story of God intervening and correcting the course of mankind. He needed to get their attention. God had instructed mankind from the very beginning, Genesis 1:28, to “Be fruitful and increase in number: fill the whole earth and subdue it.” Yet, in the story of Babel, the people have forgotten those words. Their goal is to isolate themselves, to build a wall around the city, to keep to themselves, to keep from being scattered all across the earth. God wanted them to fill the earth, and they wanted to keep from filling the earth and stay in their nice comfort zone with each other. You can almost hear them asking, Why do we need anyone else? Why do we need to go anywhere else? We have everything we need right here. Let’s stay here forever.
But that was never God’s design. God called Abram out of his country, Genesis 12; He sent Paul to the Gentiles throughout Asia, (Acts). He calls us to take His love to the nations, to go into Judea and Samaria and the uttermost parts of the earth (Acts 1:8). He calls us to follow Him, wherever He leads, whether here at home or far abroad, across town serving or across the world.
And in the story of Babel, when ALL the people unanimously decided they didn’t need to follow, that they needed to stay and make for themselves a name and a tower, they were heading in the wrong direction, directly away from what God had commanded. Stephen Covey says leaders make sure the ladders they are climbing are leaning against the right walls. And here, no one was leading, no one was asking if they were doing the right thing. No one was speaking up reminding them of God’s greater purpose and His will.
So, God intervened and got their attention. He sent them a much-needed course correction, to re-orient the whole group of them to His will. He scattered them across the earth. He put them exactly where He wanted them to be all along, all over the earth. I can imagine His voice, saying “recalculating.”
It’s similar to the story of Jonah. God called Jonah to go and preach to the city of Ninevah. Jonah didn’t want to go, so he headed in the opposite direction. But God is sovereign and He issues course corrections, as needed. He got Jonah’s attention and redirected his path. God used a whale and some fishermen to accomplish His will. And He put Jonah back on the path to Ninevah, where He wanted Jonah all along.
That can seem kind of harsh, if we just look at the surface. God is sovereign and He is going to accomplish His will regardless. But if we look at His will, we see it’s not harsh at all. It’s because of His great love for us that He guides us and corrects us. As a loving Father, He wants the best for us, even if that means disciplining us. He works all things out for good in our lives and like a good Father, He has good things in store. Sometimes that means keeping us from the danger of ourselves, and sometimes that means getting our attention when we are heading in the wrong direction. God had great plans for Jonah’s life – to use him to ignite a large revival and bring a whole people group back to God. God used Babel for good by placing people all over the earth. From the very beginning God’s design was for all the nations and all the earth to know Him, His truth and His great love. A message that we are never to forget (Deuteronomy 6:4-9) and one that Jesus would again command us to fulfill (Matthew 28:19-20).
God’s discipline is unpleasant at times, but I’m so glad that He is a loving Father that doesn’t allow us to continue down the wrong roads. I’m thankful for the course corrections in my life. They are proofs of a Father’s love and His master plan.
“Our Fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that that we may share in His holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it” (Hebrews 12: 10-11). Read another blog post on these verses here.
When has God corrected your course? In what ways has God’s discipline in your life brought a harvest of righteousness? Please share your comments and stories.
Am I alone here? Or can many of us sometime think we are on the right course, even when we are confidently heading in the wrong direction? Even when we don’t like to admit it, we sometimes need a “Sari” or someone to intervene and get our attention. We need someone to alert us that we are headed on the wrong path. We need someone to correct our course and to get us back on the right path to our destination.
The Tower of Babel is the story of God intervening and correcting the course of mankind. He needed to get their attention. God had instructed mankind from the very beginning, Genesis 1:28, to “Be fruitful and increase in number: fill the whole earth and subdue it.” Yet, in the story of Babel, the people have forgotten those words. Their goal is to isolate themselves, to build a wall around the city, to keep to themselves, to keep from being scattered all across the earth. God wanted them to fill the earth, and they wanted to keep from filling the earth and stay in their nice comfort zone with each other. You can almost hear them asking, Why do we need anyone else? Why do we need to go anywhere else? We have everything we need right here. Let’s stay here forever.
But that was never God’s design. God called Abram out of his country, Genesis 12; He sent Paul to the Gentiles throughout Asia, (Acts). He calls us to take His love to the nations, to go into Judea and Samaria and the uttermost parts of the earth (Acts 1:8). He calls us to follow Him, wherever He leads, whether here at home or far abroad, across town serving or across the world.
And in the story of Babel, when ALL the people unanimously decided they didn’t need to follow, that they needed to stay and make for themselves a name and a tower, they were heading in the wrong direction, directly away from what God had commanded. Stephen Covey says leaders make sure the ladders they are climbing are leaning against the right walls. And here, no one was leading, no one was asking if they were doing the right thing. No one was speaking up reminding them of God’s greater purpose and His will.
So, God intervened and got their attention. He sent them a much-needed course correction, to re-orient the whole group of them to His will. He scattered them across the earth. He put them exactly where He wanted them to be all along, all over the earth. I can imagine His voice, saying “recalculating.”
It’s similar to the story of Jonah. God called Jonah to go and preach to the city of Ninevah. Jonah didn’t want to go, so he headed in the opposite direction. But God is sovereign and He issues course corrections, as needed. He got Jonah’s attention and redirected his path. God used a whale and some fishermen to accomplish His will. And He put Jonah back on the path to Ninevah, where He wanted Jonah all along.
That can seem kind of harsh, if we just look at the surface. God is sovereign and He is going to accomplish His will regardless. But if we look at His will, we see it’s not harsh at all. It’s because of His great love for us that He guides us and corrects us. As a loving Father, He wants the best for us, even if that means disciplining us. He works all things out for good in our lives and like a good Father, He has good things in store. Sometimes that means keeping us from the danger of ourselves, and sometimes that means getting our attention when we are heading in the wrong direction. God had great plans for Jonah’s life – to use him to ignite a large revival and bring a whole people group back to God. God used Babel for good by placing people all over the earth. From the very beginning God’s design was for all the nations and all the earth to know Him, His truth and His great love. A message that we are never to forget (Deuteronomy 6:4-9) and one that Jesus would again command us to fulfill (Matthew 28:19-20).
God’s discipline is unpleasant at times, but I’m so glad that He is a loving Father that doesn’t allow us to continue down the wrong roads. I’m thankful for the course corrections in my life. They are proofs of a Father’s love and His master plan.
“Our Fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that that we may share in His holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it” (Hebrews 12: 10-11). Read another blog post on these verses here.
When has God corrected your course? In what ways has God’s discipline in your life brought a harvest of righteousness? Please share your comments and stories.
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Seeking a Heart Like His
After finishing up the RuthSaga, it’s time to turn the page to the part of the legacy she left behind – the story of her grandson, David, who would become king of Israel and most importantly, a man after God’s own heart.
As I get ready to dive into David’s life, I want to keep asking that question – what made him a man after God’s own heart? He certainly wasn’t perfect – there are some pretty big moral failures in his life. He certainly had family issues and personal conflicts. But yet, there was something about his heart that stood the test of time, that saw him through the waiting to become king, the sin with Bathsheba, the trouble with his family. There was something about him, maybe about the way he tended his sheep, or the way he faced the “giants” in his life, something about the way he sought to honor God and humbled himself before Him. There was something different about this man.
Whatever that something different was, I want it. I want a heart like his. I want to be a woman after God’s heart, to live my life in a way that glorifies Him, that has the tenderness of a shepherd and the boldness of a warrior.
I think of the Brandon Heath song, “Give Me Your Eyes.” I’ve quoted it many times before as the prayer of my heart. Lord, give me your eyes for others. Give me a heart like yours. I want my desires to mirror yours. I want my life to be pleasing in your eyes. Teach me & show me.
What do you think it means to be a person after God’s heart? What does that look like for you? Share your thoughts and comments. And stay tuned for more as we delve into this study of David.
As I get ready to dive into David’s life, I want to keep asking that question – what made him a man after God’s own heart? He certainly wasn’t perfect – there are some pretty big moral failures in his life. He certainly had family issues and personal conflicts. But yet, there was something about his heart that stood the test of time, that saw him through the waiting to become king, the sin with Bathsheba, the trouble with his family. There was something about him, maybe about the way he tended his sheep, or the way he faced the “giants” in his life, something about the way he sought to honor God and humbled himself before Him. There was something different about this man.
Whatever that something different was, I want it. I want a heart like his. I want to be a woman after God’s heart, to live my life in a way that glorifies Him, that has the tenderness of a shepherd and the boldness of a warrior.
I think of the Brandon Heath song, “Give Me Your Eyes.” I’ve quoted it many times before as the prayer of my heart. Lord, give me your eyes for others. Give me a heart like yours. I want my desires to mirror yours. I want my life to be pleasing in your eyes. Teach me & show me.
What do you think it means to be a person after God’s heart? What does that look like for you? Share your thoughts and comments. And stay tuned for more as we delve into this study of David.
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Living Expectantly
Hope. It’s a strange thing. We want it. We seek it. But we’re almost afraid to have it. We’re afraid to be disappointed, afraid the reality won’t live up to our expectations. Sometimes, we’re afraid to imagine that God has something for us, and that something might be good.
I wonder what went through Ruth’s mind throughout this story. What was she thinking when she chose to follow Naomi back to Bethlehem? What could she have hoped for there? A husband seemed like a far stretch. Maybe she went just resigned to a life with a bitter mother-in-law – maybe she thought that was all she deserved or maybe she felt it was just the lot given to her. That’s what she needed to do. It felt like the right thing regardless if it meant laying down all her hopes and dreams.
I wonder what went through her mind as she approached the threshing floor. Did she let herself hope at this point? Could she imagine that Boaz would want to marry her? Or did she just go to be obedient to her mother-in-law’s wishes? Was she again just doing what she had to do?
As this other close relative, the other potential kinsman-redeemer comes on the scene, was she hopeful that someone would want to marry her? Could she imagine things working out? Or was she just resigned to be part of the property negotiated away by business men?
As I look at Ruth’s story, and all these incidents along the way, I think she had to have seeds of hope – perhaps planted in Boaz’ willingness to provide, by his invitation to the table, by the rumors early on of God’s provision in the midst of famine. Without hope, these incidents just look like going through the motions of life, hanging on by a thread. Yet, how often do we find ourselves there? How often do we feel like we walked away from our hopes and dreams? That there is no hope left for us. I’ve been there. I’ve felt that opportunities have passed me by or I made wrong choices or my favorite – that just must not have been God’s will for my life. And so, I leave hope on the side of the road and plug along resigned to live a perfectly mediocre but far from abundant life in Christ.
Here’s the thing, though. Ruth didn’t have any idea of the story that God wanted to write in her life. She didn’t know what God was going to do, she didn’t know that she was going to end up in Boaz’ field or that Boaz would even notice her. She didn’t know if she was going to get married again or if she was going to have a child. She didn’t know if Naomi would ever get over her bitterness. She didn’t know what was in store for her. BUT she lived expectantly. She lived sensing that God was going to do something, that if God was truly coming to the aid of His people, then maybe just maybe He could come to her aid and Naomi’s aid. She stepped out in faith expecting good things to happen, expecting God to work.
I would have been terrified to go work in a stranger’s field alone as a foreigner – but she went expecting God to provide food for her there. She approached the threshing floor, approached Boaz, and went expectantly –boldly proposing to him and asking him to serve as her kinsman-redeemer. She didn’t go timidly and say oh, you probably don’t want to marry me, a foreigner; you’ll be jeopardizing everything. She went expecting great things, realizing Boaz was a man of character, a man who echoed God’s provision and His care for His people. And she was bold enough to hope that she could be included in that promise and provision.
I think sometimes we have a hard time believing and living expectantly in Christ. We have a hard time allowing ourselves to hope that God has good things in store for us. And yet scripture tells us over and over that He is our Father, who takes delight in giving good gifts to His children.
I wonder what went through Ruth’s mind throughout this story. What was she thinking when she chose to follow Naomi back to Bethlehem? What could she have hoped for there? A husband seemed like a far stretch. Maybe she went just resigned to a life with a bitter mother-in-law – maybe she thought that was all she deserved or maybe she felt it was just the lot given to her. That’s what she needed to do. It felt like the right thing regardless if it meant laying down all her hopes and dreams.
I wonder what went through her mind as she approached the threshing floor. Did she let herself hope at this point? Could she imagine that Boaz would want to marry her? Or did she just go to be obedient to her mother-in-law’s wishes? Was she again just doing what she had to do?
As this other close relative, the other potential kinsman-redeemer comes on the scene, was she hopeful that someone would want to marry her? Could she imagine things working out? Or was she just resigned to be part of the property negotiated away by business men?
As I look at Ruth’s story, and all these incidents along the way, I think she had to have seeds of hope – perhaps planted in Boaz’ willingness to provide, by his invitation to the table, by the rumors early on of God’s provision in the midst of famine. Without hope, these incidents just look like going through the motions of life, hanging on by a thread. Yet, how often do we find ourselves there? How often do we feel like we walked away from our hopes and dreams? That there is no hope left for us. I’ve been there. I’ve felt that opportunities have passed me by or I made wrong choices or my favorite – that just must not have been God’s will for my life. And so, I leave hope on the side of the road and plug along resigned to live a perfectly mediocre but far from abundant life in Christ.
Here’s the thing, though. Ruth didn’t have any idea of the story that God wanted to write in her life. She didn’t know what God was going to do, she didn’t know that she was going to end up in Boaz’ field or that Boaz would even notice her. She didn’t know if she was going to get married again or if she was going to have a child. She didn’t know if Naomi would ever get over her bitterness. She didn’t know what was in store for her. BUT she lived expectantly. She lived sensing that God was going to do something, that if God was truly coming to the aid of His people, then maybe just maybe He could come to her aid and Naomi’s aid. She stepped out in faith expecting good things to happen, expecting God to work.
I would have been terrified to go work in a stranger’s field alone as a foreigner – but she went expecting God to provide food for her there. She approached the threshing floor, approached Boaz, and went expectantly –boldly proposing to him and asking him to serve as her kinsman-redeemer. She didn’t go timidly and say oh, you probably don’t want to marry me, a foreigner; you’ll be jeopardizing everything. She went expecting great things, realizing Boaz was a man of character, a man who echoed God’s provision and His care for His people. And she was bold enough to hope that she could be included in that promise and provision.
I think sometimes we have a hard time believing and living expectantly in Christ. We have a hard time allowing ourselves to hope that God has good things in store for us. And yet scripture tells us over and over that He is our Father, who takes delight in giving good gifts to His children.
- “Which of you, if his son ask for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, who are evil know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in Heaven give good gifts to those who ask Him?” (Matthew 7: 9-11)
(In the midst of captivity and judgment) “For I know the plans that I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” (Jeremiah 29:11)
(During suffering and persecution) “And the God of all grace, who called you into eternal glory in Christ Jesus, after you have suffered for a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm, and steadfast.” (1 Peter 5:10)
“And we know that in all things (even heartache, loss, famine) God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to His purpose.” (Romans 8:28)
“Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?...No! In all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, neither angels or demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus, our Lord.” (Romans 8:35-39)
Sunday, October 9, 2011
Confessions of a Non-Flosser
This post is a reprint from a series of reflections leading up to my 2010 trip to Nicaragua. I have found myself revisiting it as I continue to ask God to give me the desire to do the things that I need to do. After studying Romans 7, I realize that even when my heart is in the right place, the struggles continue. I need God's grace in moments of weakness and His power to change my heart and my mind.
Ok. I admit it. I don’t floss. I went to the dentist several weeks ago and was once again reminded that I NEED to floss. I WANT to take care of my teeth. I take care to use the right toothbrush, brush for 2-3 minutes, use the right mouthwash and in most other respects take very good care of my teeth and gums. But I just don’t like flossing. It doesn’t seem natural to me. It takes a long time, particularly trying to reach in between those back teeth; it’s uncomfortable wrapping the floss around my fingers; and then of course there is the saliva, which just makes it icky to mess around in my mouth too long. Oh, I know there are solutions that can help. Honestly, though, I want to take care of my teeth, but I just really don’t want to floss. I am sure that if I made up my mind to do it, I would find a way to make it less uncomfortable and maybe even a little more joyful, but flossing is not something I have a burning desire to add to my morning or evening routine.
Sometimes there are other things that are like flossing to me. There are things that I know I need to do. God’s directives are sometimes very clear to me, and yet, I don’t want to do them. I don’t even want to want to do them. Some of His commands just don’t seem natural to me. They make me feel uncomfortable or icky – like loving my enemies or presenting the Gospel to a close friend.
I respond to God the way I respond to the hygienist. She asks about my flossing, and I pretend to listen; I assure her that I understand the importance; I even floss a little while I am there to show her that I know how to do it. But then I take the free sample of floss and go home with no intention of changing my habits. I ignore her advice and choose to stay with my comfortable routine. I ignore the opportunities to share my faith with those around me. I give my money, but do I really need to care about those who are hurting or poor or different from me? I rationalize and I ignore, satisfying myself with my own meager efforts that never require me to be uncomfortable or to give sacrificially.
I know, though, that I am called to care, to respond, to give, and that as Christians, we all are. We are called to move beyond the ickiness, to love our neighbor, even when he is annoying, and to share our faith, even when it is awkward. We are called to care about the people in our neighborhood and the people on the other side of the world.
When I go in for my regular checkups, I hear Him reminding me of those truths. He chides me - sometimes gently and sometimes firmly commanding my obedience. He shows me the plaque building up and the consequences of sin. He shows me those hurting and those in desperate need of His love and His truth. So I confess my sin, and repent, choosing to follow and this time, sincerely desiring to change. I choose to move beyond the ickiness and to follow His lead. Even though it may not come naturally at first, with practice hopefully it will become a familiar part of my routine, one that will help fill cavities of a far more serious kind.
Ok. I admit it. I don’t floss. I went to the dentist several weeks ago and was once again reminded that I NEED to floss. I WANT to take care of my teeth. I take care to use the right toothbrush, brush for 2-3 minutes, use the right mouthwash and in most other respects take very good care of my teeth and gums. But I just don’t like flossing. It doesn’t seem natural to me. It takes a long time, particularly trying to reach in between those back teeth; it’s uncomfortable wrapping the floss around my fingers; and then of course there is the saliva, which just makes it icky to mess around in my mouth too long. Oh, I know there are solutions that can help. Honestly, though, I want to take care of my teeth, but I just really don’t want to floss. I am sure that if I made up my mind to do it, I would find a way to make it less uncomfortable and maybe even a little more joyful, but flossing is not something I have a burning desire to add to my morning or evening routine.
Sometimes there are other things that are like flossing to me. There are things that I know I need to do. God’s directives are sometimes very clear to me, and yet, I don’t want to do them. I don’t even want to want to do them. Some of His commands just don’t seem natural to me. They make me feel uncomfortable or icky – like loving my enemies or presenting the Gospel to a close friend.
I respond to God the way I respond to the hygienist. She asks about my flossing, and I pretend to listen; I assure her that I understand the importance; I even floss a little while I am there to show her that I know how to do it. But then I take the free sample of floss and go home with no intention of changing my habits. I ignore her advice and choose to stay with my comfortable routine. I ignore the opportunities to share my faith with those around me. I give my money, but do I really need to care about those who are hurting or poor or different from me? I rationalize and I ignore, satisfying myself with my own meager efforts that never require me to be uncomfortable or to give sacrificially.
I know, though, that I am called to care, to respond, to give, and that as Christians, we all are. We are called to move beyond the ickiness, to love our neighbor, even when he is annoying, and to share our faith, even when it is awkward. We are called to care about the people in our neighborhood and the people on the other side of the world.
When I go in for my regular checkups, I hear Him reminding me of those truths. He chides me - sometimes gently and sometimes firmly commanding my obedience. He shows me the plaque building up and the consequences of sin. He shows me those hurting and those in desperate need of His love and His truth. So I confess my sin, and repent, choosing to follow and this time, sincerely desiring to change. I choose to move beyond the ickiness and to follow His lead. Even though it may not come naturally at first, with practice hopefully it will become a familiar part of my routine, one that will help fill cavities of a far more serious kind.
Saturday, October 8, 2011
The Threshing Floor
This lesson, based in Ruth chapter 3, has hit me particularly hard this week. Ruth steps out in courage and goes to the threshing floor to propose to Boaz. The waiting is over. Naomi gives her instructions and her blessing and now the only thing left for her to do is to approach Boaz.
For me, this lesson is not so much about proposing - I've never had the inclination to propose to anyone. It is, though, for me a lesson about being willing to trust God enough to step out in faith, not knowing what the response will be. I've struggled with that in regards to dating, in regards to work, in regards to my writing. I trust God, but sometimes I still let fear hold me back instead of moving forward in faith and trusting God with whatever happens.
That's what I appreciate about Ruth. I'm sure she was afraid of how Boaz would respond. Here was this guy who had taken her under his wing, looked after her and protected her, provided food for her and Naomi. She had to be afraid of screwing all that up. This proposal was going to change things between them - for better or worse. If her proposal was unfavorably received, she could be jeopardizing her primary source of provision. Boaz had been incredibly kind to her, but marriage is different - it goes beyond typical kindness. Boaz was a man of standing in the community and here was Ruth, a foreigner. He might be willing to invite her to the table, to be friends with her, but marrying her was an entirely different matter. This could jeopardize his standing in the community. Then there is the possibility that Boaz would think less of her for going to the threshing floor, not exactly a place of good repute. Would just the act of going reflect poorly on her?
As I picture it, all these fears had to be running through her mind. But then again, I am used to fears running through my mind. Sometimes I hear a constant stream of what ifs playing, and I can't seem to find the mute button. But regardless of whether the audio was playing in Ruth's mind or not, she went anyway. She didn't know how things were going to turn out. She didn't know how Boaz would respond, but she still stepped out in courage, with boldness, opening herself up to what God had in store for her.
What if she hadn't gone? What if she had listened to those fears? She would have kept on working in the fields, gathering food for herself and Naomi. Things would have continued rather normally. BUT... she would have missed out on Boaz, missed out on the story God wanted to write in her life. She never would have been a part of the line of King David. She wouldn't be listed in the geneology of Jesus. She would have lived a perfectly mediocre life without the incredible blessings God had in store for her.
That's what I want think God has been trying to show me this week, the importance of replacing my fearful what ifs with what if nots... What am I missing out on when I let fear hold me back? How does God want to bless me as I step out and trust Him? What story does God want to write in my life? Looking back, I see opportunities that I let slip away, times when I was too afraid of what might happen, good or bad, times when I was too afraid of opening up myself to what God wanted to do. I wonder what if. It's not that I imagine things would have worked out perfectly, but what would I have learned walking through it with Christ, what would I have learned about trusting Him? Those questions are not meant to tie me up in the past. I am usually fairly good about leaving the past behind me and living without regrets. I know I can't change those times, but I can choose here and now to make myself available, to choose faith over fear. I can choose a better way. I want to find out what God might want to do with my writing. I want to find out what God has in store for me career-wise. I don't want to close myself off to new opportunities because I am afraid.
"Perfect love casts out fear" (1 John 4:18). Ruth was able to step out. I can step out. We all can step out to the threshing floor because He loves us (Romans 5:8) and He is working for our good (Romans 8:28).
For me, this lesson is not so much about proposing - I've never had the inclination to propose to anyone. It is, though, for me a lesson about being willing to trust God enough to step out in faith, not knowing what the response will be. I've struggled with that in regards to dating, in regards to work, in regards to my writing. I trust God, but sometimes I still let fear hold me back instead of moving forward in faith and trusting God with whatever happens.
That's what I appreciate about Ruth. I'm sure she was afraid of how Boaz would respond. Here was this guy who had taken her under his wing, looked after her and protected her, provided food for her and Naomi. She had to be afraid of screwing all that up. This proposal was going to change things between them - for better or worse. If her proposal was unfavorably received, she could be jeopardizing her primary source of provision. Boaz had been incredibly kind to her, but marriage is different - it goes beyond typical kindness. Boaz was a man of standing in the community and here was Ruth, a foreigner. He might be willing to invite her to the table, to be friends with her, but marrying her was an entirely different matter. This could jeopardize his standing in the community. Then there is the possibility that Boaz would think less of her for going to the threshing floor, not exactly a place of good repute. Would just the act of going reflect poorly on her?
As I picture it, all these fears had to be running through her mind. But then again, I am used to fears running through my mind. Sometimes I hear a constant stream of what ifs playing, and I can't seem to find the mute button. But regardless of whether the audio was playing in Ruth's mind or not, she went anyway. She didn't know how things were going to turn out. She didn't know how Boaz would respond, but she still stepped out in courage, with boldness, opening herself up to what God had in store for her.
What if she hadn't gone? What if she had listened to those fears? She would have kept on working in the fields, gathering food for herself and Naomi. Things would have continued rather normally. BUT... she would have missed out on Boaz, missed out on the story God wanted to write in her life. She never would have been a part of the line of King David. She wouldn't be listed in the geneology of Jesus. She would have lived a perfectly mediocre life without the incredible blessings God had in store for her.
That's what I want think God has been trying to show me this week, the importance of replacing my fearful what ifs with what if nots... What am I missing out on when I let fear hold me back? How does God want to bless me as I step out and trust Him? What story does God want to write in my life? Looking back, I see opportunities that I let slip away, times when I was too afraid of what might happen, good or bad, times when I was too afraid of opening up myself to what God wanted to do. I wonder what if. It's not that I imagine things would have worked out perfectly, but what would I have learned walking through it with Christ, what would I have learned about trusting Him? Those questions are not meant to tie me up in the past. I am usually fairly good about leaving the past behind me and living without regrets. I know I can't change those times, but I can choose here and now to make myself available, to choose faith over fear. I can choose a better way. I want to find out what God might want to do with my writing. I want to find out what God has in store for me career-wise. I don't want to close myself off to new opportunities because I am afraid.
"Perfect love casts out fear" (1 John 4:18). Ruth was able to step out. I can step out. We all can step out to the threshing floor because He loves us (Romans 5:8) and He is working for our good (Romans 8:28).
The Game-Changing Pursuit
If you are like me, you may have read the story of Ruth before and thought Ruth pursued Boaz (see chapter 3). However, as I re-read chapter 2 today, I am increasingly convinced that Boaz pursued Ruth. I don't think Ruth ever would have approached Boaz in chapter 3 if he had not torn down the barriers between them in these first game changing encounters in chapter 2.
Almost immediately from their first encounter, Boaz put himself in the role of protector over Ruth. He ensured her safety while working in the fields, provided for her thirst, and connected her with his servant girls. He went far beyond what the law required in terms of providing for the poor and acknowledged Ruth's extraordinary kindness to Naomi. If the story ended there, it would a very noble platonic act of kindness that spoke well of Boaz' character. Here, he is definitely a good guy.
But here, (Ruth 2: 10-13) he is still far removed from Ruth, socially and polically. There are still numerous boundaries set up between them that would make it impossible for either of them to even consider dating or marriage. (I'm guessing dating wasn't that popular - probably more straight marriage talk.) Ruth even responds to his kindness by admitting she doesn't even have the status of one of his servant girls. This relationship is doomed before it ever starts. He is way out of her league. A proposal is preposterous at this point.
But, game changer, the story doesn't end there. For whatever reason, Boaz reaches out to Ruth again, this time not to protect her, this time he invites her to his table (v 14-15) This time, he removes the social and political barriers, the cultural norms that would normally keep them at a safe distance from each other. He removes and ignores those norms and invites her to eat at his table, with his harvesters. He is in essence saying, you are much more than a servant girl. I want to continue the conversation,to get to know you. I want to invite you into my world.
I wonder if Ruth was flustered. I'm sure she didn't have time to primp and dress up. And after all, she had been working in the field all day - hot and sweaty, probably feeling not so attractive. Of all times to be invited to dinner with this wealthy, influential, probably attractive man and his harvesters. Not that this was a fancy occasion - they had been in the fields all day too - but it was special, because invitations like this didn't come for girls like Ruth. Girls like Ruth weren't invited to dinner, weren't invited anywhere. I wonder if Ruth felt out of place, worried about what to talk about, or how much to eat. She was probably starving, but we all know you don't want people to see you eat too much. I wonder if she was excited, if she started thinking about telling Naomi about her experiences, about this nice guy and his kindness to her. Even if nothing else came from this evening, it would likely be a day she would never forget.
I could fill in some date stories here, but I kind of like keeping the focus on Ruth. Isn't it a beautiful romance in the making? Separated by so many differences, and yet, in one simple act, Boaz removes those barriers and invites her into his world. And I believe it is this act that sets the stage for Chapter 3. This act is far beyond an act of kindness to a stranger; this act turns a stranger and a foreigner into a friend. As any respectable man, he even give her flowers - okay bundles of barley - but he doesn't send her home empty-handed.
Maybe I am romanticizing this encounter a little much. There is nothing overtly romantic in this encounter, but I do think it was a game changer. Without Boaz reaching out to Ruth, inviting her into his world, they would be forever divided by the cultural norms of the day. They would have been in separate worlds divided by ethnicity and socio-economic status. She never would have been able to approach him to ask him to be a kinsman-redeemer. That conversation could never have taken place. This game changer so important for another reason as well. This game changer is a precursor to the biggest game changer of them all - Jesus Christ. We, who were separated from God by our status as sinners, can have a relationship with Him BECAUSE He tore down the barriers. He came into our world, died and rose again to make it possible for us to be reconciled to God, for us in our unrighteousness and unworthiness to approach God in His righteousness and His Holiness. In Him, "There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female," (Galatians 3:28). All those barriers are now gone. They no longer hold us back from God or from each other. And even better, He invites us to His table (Revelation 19:6-10) to dine with Him. He wants to fellowship with us and get to know us and continue the conversation.
Hmmm... I love that picture. I am so glad that He notices me, that He cares, and that He pursues a relationship with me - even when I've been working in the fields and not feeling very attractive or loveable.
~Erin
Almost immediately from their first encounter, Boaz put himself in the role of protector over Ruth. He ensured her safety while working in the fields, provided for her thirst, and connected her with his servant girls. He went far beyond what the law required in terms of providing for the poor and acknowledged Ruth's extraordinary kindness to Naomi. If the story ended there, it would a very noble platonic act of kindness that spoke well of Boaz' character. Here, he is definitely a good guy.
But here, (Ruth 2: 10-13) he is still far removed from Ruth, socially and polically. There are still numerous boundaries set up between them that would make it impossible for either of them to even consider dating or marriage. (I'm guessing dating wasn't that popular - probably more straight marriage talk.) Ruth even responds to his kindness by admitting she doesn't even have the status of one of his servant girls. This relationship is doomed before it ever starts. He is way out of her league. A proposal is preposterous at this point.
But, game changer, the story doesn't end there. For whatever reason, Boaz reaches out to Ruth again, this time not to protect her, this time he invites her to his table (v 14-15) This time, he removes the social and political barriers, the cultural norms that would normally keep them at a safe distance from each other. He removes and ignores those norms and invites her to eat at his table, with his harvesters. He is in essence saying, you are much more than a servant girl. I want to continue the conversation,to get to know you. I want to invite you into my world.
I wonder if Ruth was flustered. I'm sure she didn't have time to primp and dress up. And after all, she had been working in the field all day - hot and sweaty, probably feeling not so attractive. Of all times to be invited to dinner with this wealthy, influential, probably attractive man and his harvesters. Not that this was a fancy occasion - they had been in the fields all day too - but it was special, because invitations like this didn't come for girls like Ruth. Girls like Ruth weren't invited to dinner, weren't invited anywhere. I wonder if Ruth felt out of place, worried about what to talk about, or how much to eat. She was probably starving, but we all know you don't want people to see you eat too much. I wonder if she was excited, if she started thinking about telling Naomi about her experiences, about this nice guy and his kindness to her. Even if nothing else came from this evening, it would likely be a day she would never forget.
I could fill in some date stories here, but I kind of like keeping the focus on Ruth. Isn't it a beautiful romance in the making? Separated by so many differences, and yet, in one simple act, Boaz removes those barriers and invites her into his world. And I believe it is this act that sets the stage for Chapter 3. This act is far beyond an act of kindness to a stranger; this act turns a stranger and a foreigner into a friend. As any respectable man, he even give her flowers - okay bundles of barley - but he doesn't send her home empty-handed.
Maybe I am romanticizing this encounter a little much. There is nothing overtly romantic in this encounter, but I do think it was a game changer. Without Boaz reaching out to Ruth, inviting her into his world, they would be forever divided by the cultural norms of the day. They would have been in separate worlds divided by ethnicity and socio-economic status. She never would have been able to approach him to ask him to be a kinsman-redeemer. That conversation could never have taken place. This game changer so important for another reason as well. This game changer is a precursor to the biggest game changer of them all - Jesus Christ. We, who were separated from God by our status as sinners, can have a relationship with Him BECAUSE He tore down the barriers. He came into our world, died and rose again to make it possible for us to be reconciled to God, for us in our unrighteousness and unworthiness to approach God in His righteousness and His Holiness. In Him, "There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female," (Galatians 3:28). All those barriers are now gone. They no longer hold us back from God or from each other. And even better, He invites us to His table (Revelation 19:6-10) to dine with Him. He wants to fellowship with us and get to know us and continue the conversation.
Hmmm... I love that picture. I am so glad that He notices me, that He cares, and that He pursues a relationship with me - even when I've been working in the fields and not feeling very attractive or loveable.
~Erin
My God & My Protector
Over ten years ago, when I got my first apartment and moved out of my parents’ to be on my own, one of my dad’s friends commented rather wryly, about how I shouldn’t be moving out on my own and how I should live with my parents until I was married. After all, I would be without a protector, a single woman by herself.
For those of you who know me, you can probably imagine how that comment went over. I can be stubborn, strong-willed, and outspoken at times, and my thinking and his were not exactly on the same page. Part of my story before Christ was that I didn’t think I needed anyone, not even God, but especially not a man. (I like to distinguish here between need and want. Just, FYI.)
But years, later, with hopefully more wisdom and experience, I have a slightly different take on that comment from long ago. I have now been the one with outsider labeled on her forehead multiple times, and I have moved to four different cities in those ten years – Mt Holly, NC then Rock Hill, SC, then Columbia, SC, and now Waco, TX, all places where I didn’t know anyone. All those moves later, I now know how nice it is to have someone take me under their wings, to be that protector for me.
In Rock Hill, it was Susie, one of the most incredibly vivacious and nurturing and loving women I have ever met. She immediately proclaimed herself to be my Rock Hill mother – to look after me as she would want someone to look after her daughters if they were away from home. She became an incredible mentor in my life and someone who just invested time and love in me. I so want to radiate Christ’s love to others like she did and to show that kind of hospitality.
In Columbia, it was a guy friend that I met at church that introduced me to people and helped me get connected. He became like an older brother to me over the years, the one I could turn to with crises. And then it was other friends of mine, true community – we would look out for each other physically, emotionally, and spiritually – praying during tough times, or walking each other to our cars late at night, or speaking up on relationship issues, or changing tires. Many of us didn’t have family close by, so we became like family for each other.
I think those experiences give me an appreciation for that role of protector that I didn’t have before, the need for someone I could turn to when I needed help. Now, wherever I am, I try to identify a car trouble friend – someone that I can call if my car breaks down on the side of the road. I have roadside assistance, but it is that principle of knowing who I could turn to if I needed help in a vulnerable situation. It’s one of the first to-do’s on my moving list, seeking out an emergency contact. Wow – God has a way of changing us. It sounds a little different from ten years ago and my steely stubbornness of not needing anyone.
And as I read this 2nd chapter of Ruth, I am struck by Boaz reaching out to Ruth and putting himself immediately in that role. He could easily have ignored this strange girl. He didn’t have any obligation to her. He was already providing according to the law, by allowing her to glean from the leftovers of the harvest. But he went beyond the law, beyond what he was required to do. He immediately recognized her vulnerability and reached out to her as a father figure, making arrangements to ensure her protection, urging her not to go to other fields, instructing his men to leave her alone, and placing her in community with other servant girls, so that she wouldn’t be by herself.
I can imagine how many fears Ruth must have had going into those fields for the first time by herself – as a young, single, poor foreigner. I can only imagine how relieved and how much safer she must have felt knowing now that someone was looking out for her safety and wellbeing, providing for her thirst, and showing genuine concern.
And as any wise single woman, she knows to question the kindness – to make sure it doesn’t come with strings attached of a far more sinister nature. What a relief it must have been to realize that Boaz’ kindness was not just a random act of kindness to a stranger, but a kindness of heart with sound character. Boaz’ kindness to her was with recognition of the sacrifices and kindness that Ruth herself had shown to Naomi. His kindness is not just hospitality to a stranger, but a way of recognizing and honoring Ruth’s kindness, one that could easily have been overlooked by others. I have a hard time picturing the people of Bethlehem giving Ruth a pat on the back for coming back with Naomi. I picture them instead much more likely to be saying – what on earth was she thinking? In light of her sacrifices though, how much more beautiful is it to have Boaz say, I see what you did and I think it is amazing. And just as you have taken care of Naomi, may God look over and protect you. And I’ll do my part as well.
That’s pretty amazing. My God, and my protector…
For those of you who know me, you can probably imagine how that comment went over. I can be stubborn, strong-willed, and outspoken at times, and my thinking and his were not exactly on the same page. Part of my story before Christ was that I didn’t think I needed anyone, not even God, but especially not a man. (I like to distinguish here between need and want. Just, FYI.)
But years, later, with hopefully more wisdom and experience, I have a slightly different take on that comment from long ago. I have now been the one with outsider labeled on her forehead multiple times, and I have moved to four different cities in those ten years – Mt Holly, NC then Rock Hill, SC, then Columbia, SC, and now Waco, TX, all places where I didn’t know anyone. All those moves later, I now know how nice it is to have someone take me under their wings, to be that protector for me.
In Rock Hill, it was Susie, one of the most incredibly vivacious and nurturing and loving women I have ever met. She immediately proclaimed herself to be my Rock Hill mother – to look after me as she would want someone to look after her daughters if they were away from home. She became an incredible mentor in my life and someone who just invested time and love in me. I so want to radiate Christ’s love to others like she did and to show that kind of hospitality.
In Columbia, it was a guy friend that I met at church that introduced me to people and helped me get connected. He became like an older brother to me over the years, the one I could turn to with crises. And then it was other friends of mine, true community – we would look out for each other physically, emotionally, and spiritually – praying during tough times, or walking each other to our cars late at night, or speaking up on relationship issues, or changing tires. Many of us didn’t have family close by, so we became like family for each other.
I think those experiences give me an appreciation for that role of protector that I didn’t have before, the need for someone I could turn to when I needed help. Now, wherever I am, I try to identify a car trouble friend – someone that I can call if my car breaks down on the side of the road. I have roadside assistance, but it is that principle of knowing who I could turn to if I needed help in a vulnerable situation. It’s one of the first to-do’s on my moving list, seeking out an emergency contact. Wow – God has a way of changing us. It sounds a little different from ten years ago and my steely stubbornness of not needing anyone.
And as I read this 2nd chapter of Ruth, I am struck by Boaz reaching out to Ruth and putting himself immediately in that role. He could easily have ignored this strange girl. He didn’t have any obligation to her. He was already providing according to the law, by allowing her to glean from the leftovers of the harvest. But he went beyond the law, beyond what he was required to do. He immediately recognized her vulnerability and reached out to her as a father figure, making arrangements to ensure her protection, urging her not to go to other fields, instructing his men to leave her alone, and placing her in community with other servant girls, so that she wouldn’t be by herself.
I can imagine how many fears Ruth must have had going into those fields for the first time by herself – as a young, single, poor foreigner. I can only imagine how relieved and how much safer she must have felt knowing now that someone was looking out for her safety and wellbeing, providing for her thirst, and showing genuine concern.
And as any wise single woman, she knows to question the kindness – to make sure it doesn’t come with strings attached of a far more sinister nature. What a relief it must have been to realize that Boaz’ kindness was not just a random act of kindness to a stranger, but a kindness of heart with sound character. Boaz’ kindness to her was with recognition of the sacrifices and kindness that Ruth herself had shown to Naomi. His kindness is not just hospitality to a stranger, but a way of recognizing and honoring Ruth’s kindness, one that could easily have been overlooked by others. I have a hard time picturing the people of Bethlehem giving Ruth a pat on the back for coming back with Naomi. I picture them instead much more likely to be saying – what on earth was she thinking? In light of her sacrifices though, how much more beautiful is it to have Boaz say, I see what you did and I think it is amazing. And just as you have taken care of Naomi, may God look over and protect you. And I’ll do my part as well.
That’s pretty amazing. My God, and my protector…
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
A Stranger in a Strange Land
Texas is a strange land. Things are just a little different in Texas. Sometimes I can’t quite put my finger on it, but there’s this feeling that I don’t belong here, that I am an outsider in an insider world. Don’t get me wrong – people here are polite and friendly, but most of the people around here have roots deeper than the California Redwoods. And I don’t – I don’t have that common sense of history, those common memories, that sense of settledness that seems to come with the territory. I’m single and I’ve been rather transient. I’m used to coming and going, but not necessarily staying.
I take great encouragement in the fact that Ruth was a foreigner too and very much an outsider in an insider world, an outsider geographically and an outsider religiously. I can just almost hear the gossip now –Who does she think she is? The covenant doesn’t apply to her. Over and over again the author of Ruth refers to her as Ruth the Moabitess – as if she actually wears a label saying outsider stamped on her forehead. I can relate. Sometimes, we can’t hide that the fact that we stick out like a sore thumb in a place where everyone knows everyone.
But what I like about Ruth is that she doesn’t just sit around hanging out with Naomi. She ventures out. She decides to be productive, to go about building some kind of life. She knows she & Naomi need food and she sets out to provide, even when she’s not so sure what she is doing. You could say it was reckless and dangerous to set out by herself to go glean in other people’s fields. She was young, single, poor, and a foreigner, probably the most vulnerable of all people. She sets out by herself, though, to do something, something rather than nothing. At the time, she had no idea how God would provide. She had no idea the story yet to be written. She just made a decision to do the best thing she knew to do and left the rest in God’s hands.
Sometimes starting over is like learning to walk, taking a couple of steps and falling down and getting back up again. And I’ve learned that sometimes I don’t know what to do to make things be okay, to get where God wants me to be, to get to the insider track. Sometimes I just step out and do something, hoping that God will bless it, that He will protect me even in light of my sometimes seemingly reckless decisions.
And He does. Several times this week as I have been pondering this study, God has brought to my mind my move to Columbia almost five years ago. It is almost eerie how similar the struggles are, the questions, the fears, and the process of settling in to a new environment. But what is so wonderful is seeing how God placed me right where I needed to be, answered those questions and resolved those fears over time, and led me to a peace and settledness that was much more real than geography.
Now, as I find myself asking questions or missing home, I look back at the answers He provided before, and I hear Him saying the same thing. Trust me. I work all things for good and I am at work here for your good and for a greater good. I am in control. And I care. I’m not done writing the story yet.
I look forward to letting Him write the story and to discovering the end He has in store, for Ruth and for me. Good things await. God things await.
I take great encouragement in the fact that Ruth was a foreigner too and very much an outsider in an insider world, an outsider geographically and an outsider religiously. I can just almost hear the gossip now –Who does she think she is? The covenant doesn’t apply to her. Over and over again the author of Ruth refers to her as Ruth the Moabitess – as if she actually wears a label saying outsider stamped on her forehead. I can relate. Sometimes, we can’t hide that the fact that we stick out like a sore thumb in a place where everyone knows everyone.
But what I like about Ruth is that she doesn’t just sit around hanging out with Naomi. She ventures out. She decides to be productive, to go about building some kind of life. She knows she & Naomi need food and she sets out to provide, even when she’s not so sure what she is doing. You could say it was reckless and dangerous to set out by herself to go glean in other people’s fields. She was young, single, poor, and a foreigner, probably the most vulnerable of all people. She sets out by herself, though, to do something, something rather than nothing. At the time, she had no idea how God would provide. She had no idea the story yet to be written. She just made a decision to do the best thing she knew to do and left the rest in God’s hands.
Sometimes starting over is like learning to walk, taking a couple of steps and falling down and getting back up again. And I’ve learned that sometimes I don’t know what to do to make things be okay, to get where God wants me to be, to get to the insider track. Sometimes I just step out and do something, hoping that God will bless it, that He will protect me even in light of my sometimes seemingly reckless decisions.
And He does. Several times this week as I have been pondering this study, God has brought to my mind my move to Columbia almost five years ago. It is almost eerie how similar the struggles are, the questions, the fears, and the process of settling in to a new environment. But what is so wonderful is seeing how God placed me right where I needed to be, answered those questions and resolved those fears over time, and led me to a peace and settledness that was much more real than geography.
Now, as I find myself asking questions or missing home, I look back at the answers He provided before, and I hear Him saying the same thing. Trust me. I work all things for good and I am at work here for your good and for a greater good. I am in control. And I care. I’m not done writing the story yet.
I look forward to letting Him write the story and to discovering the end He has in store, for Ruth and for me. Good things await. God things await.
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Giving, Stubborness, & Second Chances
Imagine two brothers, different personalities & interests. Imagine growing up together in a close-knit family and just imagine there is some sibling rivalry going on. Perhaps over the years, the brothers went their separate ways so to speak and made different choices in their lives. Then imagine them both coming to church and presenting their gifts to God - the fruits of their labor, time and energy. Now picture one of those brothers being recognized and commended for his offering and the other not. The second brother's offering was frowned upon and found to be wanting. And oh, the sibling rivalry comes full throttle and all that built up resentment from the years comes rushing back. That scene, between Cain & Abel, is where we pick up today with the Genesis Story, Genesis chapter 4.
This story is not so much about the sibling rivalry but really about Cain and his personal struggle with sin. Cain & Abel are brothers - Abel was a shepherd, and Cain was a farmer. Both of them came to present their offerings to God. Abel comes, we are told, bringing the firstborn of his flock (v 4). We find out in Hebrews, that Abel brought his offering in faith, out of a righteous heart toward God (Hebrews 11:4). In contrast, we are not told much about Cain’s offering, other than his offering was displeasing to God. We are not told that Cain gave the best, or the first fruits, or that his heart was righteous toward God. No such commentary.
I wonder how God reflects on our giving? If He were writing commentary on our offerings, would He say they reflect a righteous heart like Abel? Would He be pleased? Would He say that we had given our best and our first? Or does He look with displeasure on our offerings, seeing not just what we gave but what we held back from Him? Would he see our hearts were more focused on giving ourselves a pat on the back, or on truly worshipping God as the giver of all good things?
Those questions haunt me, as I think they should haunt all of us. I want to please God. I want to give God my best, but I know I don’t always live up to that. Sometimes, I put everything else in my life first and then give Him whatever time, money, energy is left over. And I know it must grieve Him so much; it so displeases and dishonors Him. But there is hope, for me and for all of us. God calls us back to Himself, reminds us that He only is worthy of our worship and praise. He wants and expects our best.
Look at how He responds to Cain – God engages Cain in conversation. He doesn’t just get angry at Cain and ignore him or punish him. Rather, He gets right to the heart of the matter and asks Cain to look at his own behavior, to examine his own heart. God lets Cain know this is not a favorite contest between Cain & Abel, but rather a matter of Cain’s heart. In fact, God clearly tells Cain that if he will do what is right, he will be accepted too (v7). But Cain is stubborn. He doesn’t listen. He gets angry at God and at Abel. God says, look at this. “Sin is crouching at your door. It desires to have you, but you must master it” (v4). Cain ignores God’s warnings. He blazes on by, gives in to his anger, and kills his brother Abel. He let sin win.
I’ve been there too. Maybe we all have, times when we get stubborn toward God, when we know we are wrong, but don’t want to hear it, don’t want to change. There have been times I have known I was in dangerous territory, when I felt sin crouching at my door. And I had the chance to walk away, but I didn’t, times when I let sin win. And those times brought serious consequences, just like they did for Cain (vv 10-16). But thankfully, there have also been times when I made the better choice, when I saw the dangers ahead, when God got my attention, and I was able to escape the danger, times when God’s grace spared me from walking down the wrong path. I’m so grateful for those times, times when I had a second chance to do the right thing and to make the right choice, to have the right heart toward God and toward others.
The right heart… what was God looking for in Cain? What did he desire? And what does he desire from us? All through the sermon today on this story, one passage kept coming to my mind in answer to this question, Romans 12:1-2 – “Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God – this is your spiritual act of worship….then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is, His good, pleasing, and perfect will.”
What God wanted all along was Cain’s heart, a heart that would seek to please Him – that was the act of worship, not bringing produce to lay on an altar, but bringing his life to the altar, as one set apart for the will and pleasure of God. And that is what God desires of each of us – to give Him our lives, our best, our all, to worship Him and to please Him with the way we live our lives.
Note: This reflection was prompted by Dr Mike Toby's sermon on 9/17 on Genesis 4. This sermon is part of a series of messages on Genesis at First Baptist Church Woodway.To download sermons, visit the church website: http://www.fbcwoodway.org/resources/sermons/.
This story is not so much about the sibling rivalry but really about Cain and his personal struggle with sin. Cain & Abel are brothers - Abel was a shepherd, and Cain was a farmer. Both of them came to present their offerings to God. Abel comes, we are told, bringing the firstborn of his flock (v 4). We find out in Hebrews, that Abel brought his offering in faith, out of a righteous heart toward God (Hebrews 11:4). In contrast, we are not told much about Cain’s offering, other than his offering was displeasing to God. We are not told that Cain gave the best, or the first fruits, or that his heart was righteous toward God. No such commentary.
I wonder how God reflects on our giving? If He were writing commentary on our offerings, would He say they reflect a righteous heart like Abel? Would He be pleased? Would He say that we had given our best and our first? Or does He look with displeasure on our offerings, seeing not just what we gave but what we held back from Him? Would he see our hearts were more focused on giving ourselves a pat on the back, or on truly worshipping God as the giver of all good things?
Those questions haunt me, as I think they should haunt all of us. I want to please God. I want to give God my best, but I know I don’t always live up to that. Sometimes, I put everything else in my life first and then give Him whatever time, money, energy is left over. And I know it must grieve Him so much; it so displeases and dishonors Him. But there is hope, for me and for all of us. God calls us back to Himself, reminds us that He only is worthy of our worship and praise. He wants and expects our best.
Look at how He responds to Cain – God engages Cain in conversation. He doesn’t just get angry at Cain and ignore him or punish him. Rather, He gets right to the heart of the matter and asks Cain to look at his own behavior, to examine his own heart. God lets Cain know this is not a favorite contest between Cain & Abel, but rather a matter of Cain’s heart. In fact, God clearly tells Cain that if he will do what is right, he will be accepted too (v7). But Cain is stubborn. He doesn’t listen. He gets angry at God and at Abel. God says, look at this. “Sin is crouching at your door. It desires to have you, but you must master it” (v4). Cain ignores God’s warnings. He blazes on by, gives in to his anger, and kills his brother Abel. He let sin win.
I’ve been there too. Maybe we all have, times when we get stubborn toward God, when we know we are wrong, but don’t want to hear it, don’t want to change. There have been times I have known I was in dangerous territory, when I felt sin crouching at my door. And I had the chance to walk away, but I didn’t, times when I let sin win. And those times brought serious consequences, just like they did for Cain (vv 10-16). But thankfully, there have also been times when I made the better choice, when I saw the dangers ahead, when God got my attention, and I was able to escape the danger, times when God’s grace spared me from walking down the wrong path. I’m so grateful for those times, times when I had a second chance to do the right thing and to make the right choice, to have the right heart toward God and toward others.
The right heart… what was God looking for in Cain? What did he desire? And what does he desire from us? All through the sermon today on this story, one passage kept coming to my mind in answer to this question, Romans 12:1-2 – “Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God – this is your spiritual act of worship….then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is, His good, pleasing, and perfect will.”
What God wanted all along was Cain’s heart, a heart that would seek to please Him – that was the act of worship, not bringing produce to lay on an altar, but bringing his life to the altar, as one set apart for the will and pleasure of God. And that is what God desires of each of us – to give Him our lives, our best, our all, to worship Him and to please Him with the way we live our lives.
Note: This reflection was prompted by Dr Mike Toby's sermon on 9/17 on Genesis 4. This sermon is part of a series of messages on Genesis at First Baptist Church Woodway.To download sermons, visit the church website: http://www.fbcwoodway.org/resources/sermons/.
Monday, September 12, 2011
Mother in Laws & Religion
Chapter 1 of the Ruth Saga continues... Today, we read about Naomi asking Ruth & Orpah, her two widowed daughter in laws, to return and go back to Moab. Indulge me in a picture of how this scene may have transpired, in a completely fictionalized scenario. We don’t know much about what actually happened from scripture, but just imagine what it might look like today. Imagine…
Imagine getting married to someone of a different faith, knowing the parents likely will not approve. (The Moabites were enemies of the Israelites… A Moabite probably was not the spouse Naomi wished for either of her sons.) Imagine getting married anyway and just learning to deal with the topic of religion when it comes up with his family. Maybe it’s just easier to pretend to believe the same things, to worship the same God, to silence the talk of all those “differences.” Or maybe you and your spouse compromise – choose to worship together, one week with his God, the other week with your gods. Maybe you enjoy learning more about his religion, his beliefs, his people, their culture, their faith. Maybe it’s intriguing, even if it is different from the ways you were taught, the gods that you serve, the beliefs of your people. Or maybe you just want your mother-in-law to stop holding your faith against you. Maybe you just want to get along and not replay the same faith argument over and over.
Imagine, now, that it’s several years after you got married. Your father-in-law dies, and then you husband dies. You still have a relationship with your mother-in-law, but now it’s not the same. You are both grieving. You both are facing lonely and impoverished lives as heir-less widows. But now, you don’t have to get along. You don’t have to pretend anymore to like her faith or her people, her culture. Your husband isn’t there to urge the two of you to play nice and get along. He isn’t there to mitigate the faith conversation and now you don’t have to care or explain or bother with the differences. Now you are free to worship as you please. And, your mother-in-law is preparing to return to her country. You start to go along, because you think you should. You don’t want to leave her and hear her complain again about how horrible her life is and how she has been abandoned by everyone, even God, and now even you. You just aren’t in the mood to hear her complain, so you take the path of least resistance which is to just join her. You might stay for awhile and then come up with an excuse later or a family “emergency” to turn back.
And then, wonder of all wonders, your mother-in-law gives you a way out. She brings up going back. She urges you to go back. It catches you off guard. You can’t believe she is being this nice, that she understands, that she gets it. She does see that all your hopes of getting remarried lie in your hometown, not in her land, with her people. Ah, this is the best gift she could give you, a guilt-free option to return home….
Now I realize this is a fictionalized account based on my imagination of this scene. But doesn’t it put this story in perspective a little bit? Could you imagine being in an inter-faith marriage, a marriage attached with a great deal of stigma, and then choosing to return with your mother-in-law?
It really defies reason. I completely understand Orpah turning back in the story (Ruth 1:14). But, Ruth stays. Three times, Naomi gives her a way out, and three times Ruth chooses to stay. Why? In verse 15 Naomi makes her final plea, “Look, your sister in law is going back to her people and her gods. Go back with her” (v15). Now, don’t you think this is typical mother-in-law behavior, bringing up the touchy subject of religion here? In our fictionalized account, this is your mother in law saying, I am on to you. You don’t have to pretend anymore to like my God. I know you were playing nice for your husband’s sake. I’m not going to try to win you over anymore to our beliefs. You are free to worship as you choose. Let’s not fight anymore and just go our separate ways.
So, here is the amazing part – Ruth wasn’t pretending. Somewhere along the way, her beliefs changed. Somewhere along the way, she turns her back on her culture and her people in lieu of something better. She boldly professes to Naomi – No, “Your people will be my people and your God, my God” (v16). Why? She worshipped many gods. She could have just added the God of Israel as one of her many gods. She could have went with Naomi without converting to her faith – after all, she had lived as a Moabite for years without converting to her husband’s faith.
Why? I am left wondering the why. I don’t have the clear answer from scripture, but speculating again, I suspect that something got her attention. Maybe she had heard of God’s blessing on the Israelites and His covenant with them. Maybe she had heard rumors of the Promised Land. In her statement to Naomi, though, she personalizes God, my God. So I think she had experienced Him personally in some way, through her relationship with her husband or Naomi. I suspect their love for her echoed God’s love. I imagine she saw something in them, even through the family tragedies that spoke of a peace or comfort that her gods couldn’t provide. Maybe they left her craving to know more and willing to continue on the journey with her mother-in-law, willing to choose to follow this other God and experience Him for herself.
As I ponder this story, I am left with some haunting questions, and I pose them to you as well – Do we echo God’s love for others? Is there something about our lives that leaves others craving to know God more? Are there times we go through the motions with faith, pretending to go along with the beliefs of others or unsure of what we believe? Or do we personalize our relationship with Him and choose Him over all the other false gods and distractions around?
Thank you for reading and for sharing this part of Ruth’s journey with me. Stay tuned for more, the saga is just beginning.
Imagine getting married to someone of a different faith, knowing the parents likely will not approve. (The Moabites were enemies of the Israelites… A Moabite probably was not the spouse Naomi wished for either of her sons.) Imagine getting married anyway and just learning to deal with the topic of religion when it comes up with his family. Maybe it’s just easier to pretend to believe the same things, to worship the same God, to silence the talk of all those “differences.” Or maybe you and your spouse compromise – choose to worship together, one week with his God, the other week with your gods. Maybe you enjoy learning more about his religion, his beliefs, his people, their culture, their faith. Maybe it’s intriguing, even if it is different from the ways you were taught, the gods that you serve, the beliefs of your people. Or maybe you just want your mother-in-law to stop holding your faith against you. Maybe you just want to get along and not replay the same faith argument over and over.
Imagine, now, that it’s several years after you got married. Your father-in-law dies, and then you husband dies. You still have a relationship with your mother-in-law, but now it’s not the same. You are both grieving. You both are facing lonely and impoverished lives as heir-less widows. But now, you don’t have to get along. You don’t have to pretend anymore to like her faith or her people, her culture. Your husband isn’t there to urge the two of you to play nice and get along. He isn’t there to mitigate the faith conversation and now you don’t have to care or explain or bother with the differences. Now you are free to worship as you please. And, your mother-in-law is preparing to return to her country. You start to go along, because you think you should. You don’t want to leave her and hear her complain again about how horrible her life is and how she has been abandoned by everyone, even God, and now even you. You just aren’t in the mood to hear her complain, so you take the path of least resistance which is to just join her. You might stay for awhile and then come up with an excuse later or a family “emergency” to turn back.
And then, wonder of all wonders, your mother-in-law gives you a way out. She brings up going back. She urges you to go back. It catches you off guard. You can’t believe she is being this nice, that she understands, that she gets it. She does see that all your hopes of getting remarried lie in your hometown, not in her land, with her people. Ah, this is the best gift she could give you, a guilt-free option to return home….
Now I realize this is a fictionalized account based on my imagination of this scene. But doesn’t it put this story in perspective a little bit? Could you imagine being in an inter-faith marriage, a marriage attached with a great deal of stigma, and then choosing to return with your mother-in-law?
It really defies reason. I completely understand Orpah turning back in the story (Ruth 1:14). But, Ruth stays. Three times, Naomi gives her a way out, and three times Ruth chooses to stay. Why? In verse 15 Naomi makes her final plea, “Look, your sister in law is going back to her people and her gods. Go back with her” (v15). Now, don’t you think this is typical mother-in-law behavior, bringing up the touchy subject of religion here? In our fictionalized account, this is your mother in law saying, I am on to you. You don’t have to pretend anymore to like my God. I know you were playing nice for your husband’s sake. I’m not going to try to win you over anymore to our beliefs. You are free to worship as you choose. Let’s not fight anymore and just go our separate ways.
So, here is the amazing part – Ruth wasn’t pretending. Somewhere along the way, her beliefs changed. Somewhere along the way, she turns her back on her culture and her people in lieu of something better. She boldly professes to Naomi – No, “Your people will be my people and your God, my God” (v16). Why? She worshipped many gods. She could have just added the God of Israel as one of her many gods. She could have went with Naomi without converting to her faith – after all, she had lived as a Moabite for years without converting to her husband’s faith.
Why? I am left wondering the why. I don’t have the clear answer from scripture, but speculating again, I suspect that something got her attention. Maybe she had heard of God’s blessing on the Israelites and His covenant with them. Maybe she had heard rumors of the Promised Land. In her statement to Naomi, though, she personalizes God, my God. So I think she had experienced Him personally in some way, through her relationship with her husband or Naomi. I suspect their love for her echoed God’s love. I imagine she saw something in them, even through the family tragedies that spoke of a peace or comfort that her gods couldn’t provide. Maybe they left her craving to know more and willing to continue on the journey with her mother-in-law, willing to choose to follow this other God and experience Him for herself.
As I ponder this story, I am left with some haunting questions, and I pose them to you as well – Do we echo God’s love for others? Is there something about our lives that leaves others craving to know God more? Are there times we go through the motions with faith, pretending to go along with the beliefs of others or unsure of what we believe? Or do we personalize our relationship with Him and choose Him over all the other false gods and distractions around?
Thank you for reading and for sharing this part of Ruth’s journey with me. Stay tuned for more, the saga is just beginning.
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Eden - The Center of God's Will
The Garden of Eden - a place created especially for Adam & Eve, a place of indescribable beauty and unmistakable pleasure – Here, Adam & Eve were free to enjoy the best of God’s creation under His provision and protection. This was paradise created by God for them, out of His good will and for His good pleasure. When he saw that it was not good for man to be alone, He created woman (Genesis 2: 18). The garden was full of trees that were “pleasing to the eye and good for food” (2:9). In every sense, He wanted the very best for them and for us.
Sometimes we think that God’s will is this scary place, somewhere to be dreaded and feared, somewhere horrible where God might call us to go, or that He wants something bad for us, that He is someone who wants to take away our freedom or that He is unreasonable and unjust. But that’s not the truth of scripture. Here, from the very beginning, God creates beauty and goodness for His children. He wanted them to enjoy the abundance of life and to have an incredibly intimate and beautiful relationship with Him.
The goodness of these plans is echoed in Jeremiah. Even while proclaiming the coming judgment and exile of the Israelites, even when bad days were coming, God reminds them that He is working for their ultimate good. “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11). And indeed Jesus comes (God Himself) and proclaims, “I have come that they may have life, and have it more abundantly” (John 10:10).
With those assurances that God cares and is working for my good and for our good, we don’t have to be afraid of His will. We don’t have to wonder if God is out to get us or to make us miserable. He’s not. He takes delight in us, and He wants the very best for us. That doesn’t mean that He caters to our desires, or is our genie in a bottle to grant our wishes. It means He is a loving Father that sees the bigger picture, that gives us boundaries to protect us from harm, instructs us in the ways that we should go, so that we will have a good and abundant life in Him, that we can enjoy the richness and intimacy of a relationship with Him.
At times, we question that goodness, particularly when God allows pain and suffering to come into our lives, or when His will seems the opposite of our desires. But James tells us that God even uses the trials of this life to work for our good. “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work, so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything” (James 1: 4). Paul iterates the same point in Romans – “And we know that in all things (even the bad things) God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to His purpose” (Romans 8:28).
Even in the face of evil, God works for good. What others mean for harm, God uses for good (Genesis 50:20). Even when we can’t see it or don’t understand it, the truth remains, God is good and we can trust that His will for us is good. “His ways are higher than our ways” (Isaiah 55: 8-9). When we follow, He leads us to green pastures and still waters; He restores our souls (Psalm 23: 2-3).
The Garden of Eden, then, is a picture of God’s great goodness, the richness and pleasure of a Father pouring out His blessing on His children, unhindered by sin and with complete and wonderful fellowship with God. What an image of what it looks like to be in the center of God’s will! That, my friends, is where I want to be. Don’t you?
Note: This reflection was prompted by Dr Mike Toby's sermon series on Genesis at First Baptist Church Woodway. To download sermons, visit the church website: http://www.fbcwoodway.org/resources/sermons/.
Sometimes we think that God’s will is this scary place, somewhere to be dreaded and feared, somewhere horrible where God might call us to go, or that He wants something bad for us, that He is someone who wants to take away our freedom or that He is unreasonable and unjust. But that’s not the truth of scripture. Here, from the very beginning, God creates beauty and goodness for His children. He wanted them to enjoy the abundance of life and to have an incredibly intimate and beautiful relationship with Him.
The goodness of these plans is echoed in Jeremiah. Even while proclaiming the coming judgment and exile of the Israelites, even when bad days were coming, God reminds them that He is working for their ultimate good. “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11). And indeed Jesus comes (God Himself) and proclaims, “I have come that they may have life, and have it more abundantly” (John 10:10).
With those assurances that God cares and is working for my good and for our good, we don’t have to be afraid of His will. We don’t have to wonder if God is out to get us or to make us miserable. He’s not. He takes delight in us, and He wants the very best for us. That doesn’t mean that He caters to our desires, or is our genie in a bottle to grant our wishes. It means He is a loving Father that sees the bigger picture, that gives us boundaries to protect us from harm, instructs us in the ways that we should go, so that we will have a good and abundant life in Him, that we can enjoy the richness and intimacy of a relationship with Him.
At times, we question that goodness, particularly when God allows pain and suffering to come into our lives, or when His will seems the opposite of our desires. But James tells us that God even uses the trials of this life to work for our good. “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work, so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything” (James 1: 4). Paul iterates the same point in Romans – “And we know that in all things (even the bad things) God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to His purpose” (Romans 8:28).
Even in the face of evil, God works for good. What others mean for harm, God uses for good (Genesis 50:20). Even when we can’t see it or don’t understand it, the truth remains, God is good and we can trust that His will for us is good. “His ways are higher than our ways” (Isaiah 55: 8-9). When we follow, He leads us to green pastures and still waters; He restores our souls (Psalm 23: 2-3).
The Garden of Eden, then, is a picture of God’s great goodness, the richness and pleasure of a Father pouring out His blessing on His children, unhindered by sin and with complete and wonderful fellowship with God. What an image of what it looks like to be in the center of God’s will! That, my friends, is where I want to be. Don’t you?
Note: This reflection was prompted by Dr Mike Toby's sermon series on Genesis at First Baptist Church Woodway. To download sermons, visit the church website: http://www.fbcwoodway.org/resources/sermons/.
Thursday, September 8, 2011
Facing the Famine
I started a new Bible study this week on Ruth. There was something appealing about taking a new look at the woman who left family, friends, and home behind to follow God, not really knowing what was ahead. Maybe it just sounded familiar to me, and I maybe I just craved the ending of the story where it turns out she is exactly where she is supposed to be. Maybe, just maybe I needed that reassurance myself, to be reminded that God provides and restores and that He has a good ending in store.
The story of week one & chapter one, though, starts not with Ruth but with Naomi and starts not with hope or redemption but with famine, with the land of God’s promise and provision being replaced with a dry & thirsty land. Of course, the Promised Land had never stopped being the land of promise. God was always there and always calling His people back to Himself. But they had turned their backs on Him. Seeing only the famine and not seeing God’s promises, Naomi and her husband and their two sons pack up and move. They leave town, leave the Promised Land in search of food.
God is Jehovah-Jirah, the God who provides, but He allows the famines to come. The physical famine in Egypt that brought Joseph’s brothers there (Genesis 41 & 42), the wilderness where the Israelites lived only off quail & manna (Exodus 16), the barrenness of Hannah who desperately wanted a child (1 Samuel 1), the tremendous loss in Job’s life (Job 1 & 2), the widow’s last bit of flour and oil (1 Kings 17) – scripture is full of famines, physical, emotional, and spiritual. The famines come, times when we feel that God is distant and far away, times when we question if He has forgotten us or forsaken us, times when we don’t know what is next, when it looks and feels like the barrel is running dry.
It’s a scary place to be. I would like to be like Job who responded so gracefully, “The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away. Blessed be the name of the Lord” (Job 1:21). Instead, my tendency is like Naomi and her husband’s response – let me go looking for some food, let me go searching for where God is and let me go make things happen. I like to make things happen. I am not one to whine about my circumstances. I like to fix things, to fix people, to step in and change things. It goes against my nature during a famine to “Be still and know that [He is] God” (Psalm 46:10).
For Naomi, things just got worse. Now, she is in a distant land, her husband dies, and then later her two sons die – a famine of an entirely different kind. Now, she is alone and bitter.
I’ve been in a famine. I need to admit that, really even before I moved to Texas. It sounds crazy to say that because my life has been incredibly blessed. It’s been rough, though, barren in some ways. In some ways, Texas was relief from some of that famine – relief from financial struggles and work issues. But in some ways, it led to a different kind of famine – isolation from family and friends, a lack of purpose and ministry. I left behind so much that was good in my life, people that I care about, a church and a community that felt like home. And sometimes, every once in awhile, I feel a little like Naomi – alone in a distant land and bordering on bitterness. It’s not a good place to be.
But… and I love BUTs here. But, Naomi remembers God, remembers His promises and His provision. God didn’t change. He hadn’t gone anywhere, but Naomi had gotten sidetracked by life, by the famine, by her circumstances. Then, though, she hears about God’s provision in Judah. She hears from folks at home that the famine is over, that God is providing, that there is food to eat. And immediately, she wants to be there. She wants to be back in the Promised Land and she immediately makes preparations for the journey. She remembers. She remembers (I’m imagining here) what it was like to experience God’s blessings and to live in the land flowing with milk and honey. She remembers what it felt like to be home, and she started craving it.
I fully believe one reason that God allows famines in our lives is to lead us to the place where we crave Him, where we crave His presence and His provision in our lives. Sometimes we can fill our lives with so much junk and so many distractions, and He wants us to fill our lives with Him, with His spirit, with His love. That’s what I am craving. I want more of Him and less of me. I want to be in the land of His promise and provision. I want to sense His presence and to know that I am where He has called me to be. He is the Living Water (John 4), and the One who provides a well in the desert (Genesis 21), a well that will never run dry.
The famines come, but I am so glad they are not the end of the story. In fact, the famine is only the beginning. And although Naomi returns home bitter and barren, God isn’t done with her. She is where God wants her to be and He is about to do an amazing work in her life.
Hmmm… I knew I would enjoy the story of Ruth and this Bible study. It’s definitely a message I needed to hear and needed to share. Stay tuned for more, or read ahead yourself, Ruth 1-4.
The story of week one & chapter one, though, starts not with Ruth but with Naomi and starts not with hope or redemption but with famine, with the land of God’s promise and provision being replaced with a dry & thirsty land. Of course, the Promised Land had never stopped being the land of promise. God was always there and always calling His people back to Himself. But they had turned their backs on Him. Seeing only the famine and not seeing God’s promises, Naomi and her husband and their two sons pack up and move. They leave town, leave the Promised Land in search of food.
God is Jehovah-Jirah, the God who provides, but He allows the famines to come. The physical famine in Egypt that brought Joseph’s brothers there (Genesis 41 & 42), the wilderness where the Israelites lived only off quail & manna (Exodus 16), the barrenness of Hannah who desperately wanted a child (1 Samuel 1), the tremendous loss in Job’s life (Job 1 & 2), the widow’s last bit of flour and oil (1 Kings 17) – scripture is full of famines, physical, emotional, and spiritual. The famines come, times when we feel that God is distant and far away, times when we question if He has forgotten us or forsaken us, times when we don’t know what is next, when it looks and feels like the barrel is running dry.
It’s a scary place to be. I would like to be like Job who responded so gracefully, “The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away. Blessed be the name of the Lord” (Job 1:21). Instead, my tendency is like Naomi and her husband’s response – let me go looking for some food, let me go searching for where God is and let me go make things happen. I like to make things happen. I am not one to whine about my circumstances. I like to fix things, to fix people, to step in and change things. It goes against my nature during a famine to “Be still and know that [He is] God” (Psalm 46:10).
For Naomi, things just got worse. Now, she is in a distant land, her husband dies, and then later her two sons die – a famine of an entirely different kind. Now, she is alone and bitter.
I’ve been in a famine. I need to admit that, really even before I moved to Texas. It sounds crazy to say that because my life has been incredibly blessed. It’s been rough, though, barren in some ways. In some ways, Texas was relief from some of that famine – relief from financial struggles and work issues. But in some ways, it led to a different kind of famine – isolation from family and friends, a lack of purpose and ministry. I left behind so much that was good in my life, people that I care about, a church and a community that felt like home. And sometimes, every once in awhile, I feel a little like Naomi – alone in a distant land and bordering on bitterness. It’s not a good place to be.
But… and I love BUTs here. But, Naomi remembers God, remembers His promises and His provision. God didn’t change. He hadn’t gone anywhere, but Naomi had gotten sidetracked by life, by the famine, by her circumstances. Then, though, she hears about God’s provision in Judah. She hears from folks at home that the famine is over, that God is providing, that there is food to eat. And immediately, she wants to be there. She wants to be back in the Promised Land and she immediately makes preparations for the journey. She remembers. She remembers (I’m imagining here) what it was like to experience God’s blessings and to live in the land flowing with milk and honey. She remembers what it felt like to be home, and she started craving it.
I fully believe one reason that God allows famines in our lives is to lead us to the place where we crave Him, where we crave His presence and His provision in our lives. Sometimes we can fill our lives with so much junk and so many distractions, and He wants us to fill our lives with Him, with His spirit, with His love. That’s what I am craving. I want more of Him and less of me. I want to be in the land of His promise and provision. I want to sense His presence and to know that I am where He has called me to be. He is the Living Water (John 4), and the One who provides a well in the desert (Genesis 21), a well that will never run dry.
The famines come, but I am so glad they are not the end of the story. In fact, the famine is only the beginning. And although Naomi returns home bitter and barren, God isn’t done with her. She is where God wants her to be and He is about to do an amazing work in her life.
Hmmm… I knew I would enjoy the story of Ruth and this Bible study. It’s definitely a message I needed to hear and needed to share. Stay tuned for more, or read ahead yourself, Ruth 1-4.
Monday, July 11, 2011
Overcoming the Pressure to Perform
Over the last couple of months, I’ve been working on a big project at work. It’s been one of my first big projects at my new job. Being a new girl, I want to impress people and to prove myself. I feel like people are watching me to see how I respond, and it is so easy to get caught up in trying to make a name for myself, not wanting to disappoint anyone and wanting to excel at my new job.
For the last couple of weeks, I have found myself feeling the pressure to perform, spending huge amounts of time on the project, working late, and starting to worrying about it. I’m usually good at leaving work at work when I go home each day, but this project started to dominate my thoughts and drain my energy,
For the last couple of weeks, I have found myself feeling the pressure to perform, spending huge amounts of time on the project, working late, and starting to worrying about it. I’m usually good at leaving work at work when I go home each day, but this project started to dominate my thoughts and drain my energy,
A little over a week ago, I went to visit some of my campus partners that I am working with on this project, part of my dream team. I was flustered and chaotic, starting to freak out about everything on the to-do list and all the loose ends that had to get done. Yet, they were calm. They didn’t seem flustered. And they had much more on their plate than I had on mine. It prompted my thinking and helped me put this project back into perspective.
And then I read this book, Golf’s Sacred Journey by David Cook. I am not a golfer, and I had plans to give the book to a friend of mine. I picked it up just thinking I would give it a quick glance; I didn’t put it back down. This book was just what I needed, when I needed it. It went straight to the heart of what I had been struggling with – this pressure to perform, the fear of failure, the lack of balance and rhythm than was missing. It reminded me to look at the bigger picture, the larger perspective of my life beyond this project and even this job. My life the last couple of weeks has been out of kilter because I had started focusing so much on this project, that I started neglecting the other good things in my life. I started valuing the opportunity to impress and make my mark instead of going about my business quietly and diligently (1 Thessalonians 4:11-12). Yesterday, I finished reading the book, and I took some time to really ponder its message. Then I thought again about the project, a project that is outside the normal scope of my job description, a project that is outside my realm of expertise, a project that I care deeply about but not one that is directly related to my sense of calling and my particular gifts. It seems strange that I started wanting people to weigh me by this project, or that this project would somehow define me.
So I decided to relax, to take off the burden of the expectations, to do my best but to leave the anxiety behind. And I went to work, three days before the project launches, in the midst of chaos and loose ends and details to be worked out. But this time, that chaos didn’t characterize me. I had found my balance and rhythm again. I had gleaned new perspective, and I had found that peace and contentment that had been missing. I remembered that my identity is wrapped up in Christ alone. And strangely, this huge burden started to seem more like a small project, a blip on the radar screen that will all too quickly fade away. I highly recommend the book. Even more so, I highly recommend finding that balance and rhythm in a life centered in Christ. There is no better place to be. He beckons - “Come unto me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:28-30, NIV).
Those words are good news for my week and for my soul!
Sunday, June 26, 2011
The Beauty of Suffering
Lately, I have been contemplating suffering, particularly as my grandmother has gotten weaker and weaker and has been on the brink of death. It has been hard to hear her talk about being in pain, to hear of her bad days, to sense her suffering. When I went home at the beginning of the month, she was saying her goodbyes. She is wrapping up her time here on earth and preparing to go Home. My grandmother is one of the most loving and joyful people I know. There is a beauty about her spirit that just radiates love and laughter and joy. I don’t know how else to describe it. I’ve sensed that spirit about her for a long time. Over these last few weeks though it has become even more evident, something about the suffering that she is going through and the peace that she has in the midst of it is… is touching and fragrant and beautiful. Her suffering isn’t beautiful. It’s incredibly hard at times to see her in pain and to not be able to make it better. But her suffering makes her peace even more striking, more radiant.
At church this morning, we studied the letter to the church in Smyrna (Revelation 2: 8-11). I tend to think of Revelation as this mysterious book that raises more questions than it provides answers. There is so much I don’t understand. I don’t really think of it as applying to my life, here and now. But today was different. This passage was different. It spoke right to the heart of my ponderings on suffering.
The church in Smyrna was hard-pressed and facing all kinds of trials. They were poor; they were being persecuted by the Jews; they were falsely accused and slandered by the public; they were labeled atheists (???) because they didn’t participate in the emperor worship that was prevalent. They were suffering - physically, financially, and probably emotionally. I can imagine they were probably feeling beat down by their circumstances, frustrated and discouraged. Even though I have never faced that kind of persecution, I can certainly relate to those feelings of discouragement and even despair at times; I think we all can. We can find ourselves seemingly beat down by life, wanting things to get better and looking for hope. That is what makes Jesus’ words to them stick out to me. They needed encouragement and His words spoke right to the heart of the matter.
Jesus says to this suffering church, the people right in the mix of very real trials and tribulation, “I know your afflictions and your poverty” (v 9). He says he knows the tough times they are going through. He notices. He sees. And not only that, He cares. 1 Peter 5:7 says “Cast all your cares upon Him, because He cares for you” (emphasis added). How wonderful it is that He knows our troubles, He feels our pain, He cares when we hurt! He goes on to say to them, don’t be afraid, the suffering will be intense but it won’t last forever (v 10). He then encourages them to be faithful, to continue to stand firm (v 10). He reminded them of His faithfulness and that He had already claimed the victory. He is the one who died and is now alive again. He is the Alpha and the Omega, the first and the last (v 8). He is the one that has been there from the beginning and is there now and will be there forever. What a tremendous promise, particularly when we feel alone and discouraged!What an incredible message! Here were a people feeling beat up by life, by the world around them. And Jesus encourages them. And He encourages them as one who has been there in the midst of suffering. “And because He himself suffered when He was tempted, He is able to help those who are being tempted” (Hebrews 2:18). “For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses…” (Hebrews 4:15).
So why does God allow suffering? Why not deliver us? Why doesn’t Jesus just rescue the church in Smyrna? Why doesn’t He rescue us from the hard times? Why does my grandmother have to continue to suffer? Why doesn’t He just give us the answers we are looking for?“…now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith – of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire – may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed” (1Peter 1:6-7)
God is not calloused. He cares for us deeply. In fact, He is using the suffering and the trials in our lives for our good. He refines us like gold, to strengthen our faith, and to reveal His glory. Smyrna is also the Greek word for myrrh, the fragrant oil used for burial. The oil comes from a bark that is hard-pressed. As the bark is pressed (similar to grapes in a winepress), the fragrant oil is released. Sometimes, the hard times are what God uses to bring out the valuable fragrance in us, the fragrant aroma that bears fruit in our lives.The fact that something beautiful and fragrant can come from suffering blows my mind, that God can use it for a greater purpose and He can be glorified in it. Then I think about the tough times in my life, and I think about the fruit that came out of those times – new love and compassion for others, new dependence on Christ, new maturity and lessons learned through the pain. As I look back now, I see the ways He redeemed the pain and the heartache, the ways He worked for good. The beauty is not the suffering but rather the beauty of God’s hand at work in the midst of it.
Please continue to pray for my grandmother and my family. Pray also for those who currently feel beat down by life, in the midst of the trials. I know several of my friends are going through difficult times. It's so hard to see the people we care about suffer. Pray also for those facing severe persecution, like the church in Smyrna. Their suffering makes the daily challenges of my life seem trivial and selfish.
Thursday, March 31, 2011
The Cross-Stitch
The last two weeks have been hard. I think the excitement of the new adventure wore off a little, and I just started feeling the extreme loneliness and uncertainty and emotional rollercoaster of starting over. Somedays, I come home feeling relatively good, and then at the least little thing, I just crumble and start missing home and friends and that sense of familiarity, and then shortly after that I would pull myself together and start to get excited again about being here. It’s a rollercoaster; it has been, and it probably will be for awhile.
Several weeks ago, while putting stuff away and going through boxes and whatnot, I found an old cross-stitch pattern that I started when I was a child. My grandmother and I used to do it together when I spent my summers with her. This week, I pulled it out when I was really lonely and bored and in want of something productive to do. The pattern I had started so long ago was a little boy praying. I dusted it off and picked it up and decided to complete it for my new nephew-to-be due in June.
For those of you who may not know, I do not sew. I am not the domestic type at all and neither cooking nor sewing are on my list of fun things to do. But something appealed to me about it, so I picked it up anyway. I looked at the stitches that I had done so many years ago – they were awkward and tentative, far from tight and pretty. The underside revealed a mesh of threads, quite messy and rough. But from the front, you wouldn’t necessarily know it. The foundation was there. As I started again, it was rough going – the thread broke, or it knotted, or I didn’t follow the pattern right. The stitches aren’t even and far from perfect. But slowly and surely the picture starts to take shape, almost in spite of me and my shortcomings.
As I got into a rhythm with it, my tears dried up and my lonliness started to melt. I could sense God reminding me that even when I feel like a mess, He is arranging the stitches and working the pieces together for good, for a picture that will be beautiful in the end. Even when it’s rough and threads break and things seem like they are unraveling, it’s about staying the course and following the Guide, day by day, letting Him work and untangle and build something worthwhile.
I’m excited to finish the pattern and give it to my brother & sister in law for my nephew. It will be something little that comes with a lot of love and a good story to tell.
Please continue to pray for me. The transition is hard. I know it will get better, and I know God is at work in the midst of it. I am so thankful for wonderful friends and family, all the prayers and notes of encouragement that have made it easier. I don’t know how people make it without that kind of support.
Several weeks ago, while putting stuff away and going through boxes and whatnot, I found an old cross-stitch pattern that I started when I was a child. My grandmother and I used to do it together when I spent my summers with her. This week, I pulled it out when I was really lonely and bored and in want of something productive to do. The pattern I had started so long ago was a little boy praying. I dusted it off and picked it up and decided to complete it for my new nephew-to-be due in June.
For those of you who may not know, I do not sew. I am not the domestic type at all and neither cooking nor sewing are on my list of fun things to do. But something appealed to me about it, so I picked it up anyway. I looked at the stitches that I had done so many years ago – they were awkward and tentative, far from tight and pretty. The underside revealed a mesh of threads, quite messy and rough. But from the front, you wouldn’t necessarily know it. The foundation was there. As I started again, it was rough going – the thread broke, or it knotted, or I didn’t follow the pattern right. The stitches aren’t even and far from perfect. But slowly and surely the picture starts to take shape, almost in spite of me and my shortcomings.
As I got into a rhythm with it, my tears dried up and my lonliness started to melt. I could sense God reminding me that even when I feel like a mess, He is arranging the stitches and working the pieces together for good, for a picture that will be beautiful in the end. Even when it’s rough and threads break and things seem like they are unraveling, it’s about staying the course and following the Guide, day by day, letting Him work and untangle and build something worthwhile.
I’m excited to finish the pattern and give it to my brother & sister in law for my nephew. It will be something little that comes with a lot of love and a good story to tell.
Please continue to pray for me. The transition is hard. I know it will get better, and I know God is at work in the midst of it. I am so thankful for wonderful friends and family, all the prayers and notes of encouragement that have made it easier. I don’t know how people make it without that kind of support.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Seven Years Ago...
Seven years ago yesterday, my life changed forever. Someone once asked me what was the biggest turning point in my life. I don’t have to think twice – March 21, 2004. What was so special about that day? It was the day I went from being a church goer to a Christ follower. It was the day I drew my line in the sand and chose to be a Christian.
The before and after in my life are so stark. Before Christ, I was bitter and broken, very much a person consumed with myself and thinking that I didn’t need anyone else. I was lonely and cut off from everyone, trying to be good enough to win my way in the world, full of pride and overwhelmingly obnoxious to be around. But something about experiencing the love of God in my life, feeling for the first time His overwhelming love for me, in spite of my failures and my fears, in spite of my selfishness and pride, something about experiencing that love in the deepest part of my soul changed me – it penetrated the depths of my soul and gave me hope for more. At that point in my life, I was good at walking away, but I knew I didn’t want to walk away from that. I realized how desperately I needed that love, how desperately I needed that forgiveness, how desperately I needed that hope.
I was scared to follow Christ. I didn’t know what He might ask of me, where He might call me to go, what He might want in return. I wasn’t so sure I could trust Him with my life, my desires, my plans for my life. But His love was bigger than my fears. If He loved me, His plans for me had to be good. This time, I wouldn’t walk away.
In the years since then, I’ve never regretted that decision. His love is even more real in my life today. I still get overwhelmed when I think about His love and provision in my life. Over the years, the bitterness and the pain that ate me up inside have been replaced by joy and peace and forgiveness. One of the great joys of my life now is community and friendships, and I can’t imagine choosing to go through life alone as I did before. God has changed me from the inside out and has truly given me abundant life and eternal life in Him. I think of the Brandon Heath song, "I'm not who I was," and I thank God that it's true in my life. His love changes everything; it changed me, forever.
Seven years… Happy anniversary, Lord!
The before and after in my life are so stark. Before Christ, I was bitter and broken, very much a person consumed with myself and thinking that I didn’t need anyone else. I was lonely and cut off from everyone, trying to be good enough to win my way in the world, full of pride and overwhelmingly obnoxious to be around. But something about experiencing the love of God in my life, feeling for the first time His overwhelming love for me, in spite of my failures and my fears, in spite of my selfishness and pride, something about experiencing that love in the deepest part of my soul changed me – it penetrated the depths of my soul and gave me hope for more. At that point in my life, I was good at walking away, but I knew I didn’t want to walk away from that. I realized how desperately I needed that love, how desperately I needed that forgiveness, how desperately I needed that hope.
I was scared to follow Christ. I didn’t know what He might ask of me, where He might call me to go, what He might want in return. I wasn’t so sure I could trust Him with my life, my desires, my plans for my life. But His love was bigger than my fears. If He loved me, His plans for me had to be good. This time, I wouldn’t walk away.
In the years since then, I’ve never regretted that decision. His love is even more real in my life today. I still get overwhelmed when I think about His love and provision in my life. Over the years, the bitterness and the pain that ate me up inside have been replaced by joy and peace and forgiveness. One of the great joys of my life now is community and friendships, and I can’t imagine choosing to go through life alone as I did before. God has changed me from the inside out and has truly given me abundant life and eternal life in Him. I think of the Brandon Heath song, "I'm not who I was," and I thank God that it's true in my life. His love changes everything; it changed me, forever.
Seven years… Happy anniversary, Lord!
Sunday, March 6, 2011
Abundantly More... in Texas
I have been thinking about what to write to capture this move and this transition. Last week, I moved from Columbia, SC, where I have lived the last four years, to Waco, TX, about 1000 miles away from there to start a new chapter in my life.
I guess it would be easy to say I moved for work. I accepted a new position at Baylor University. It's true, that is the impetus, but really the reason goes deeper. I feel called to be here. I'm not sure why, but over the last several months, as I prayed, though, talked through this decision, I really have sensed God leading me here. I'm not sure what God has in store for me here. I do think part of it is the job. I have a passion for students and teaching and investing in the lives of young people. And I so want to be salt and light, to make a difference in their lives for Christ, to help them discover God's purpose and His plans for their lives.
But I also think I am here for me, that I need to be here. Last year, I started reading a book called "Holy Ambition" and it talked about wanting to do great things for God. It was an incredibly powerful and poignant book based on Nehemiah. And about four or five chapters in, I stonewalled. I couldn't do anything else with the book. It talked about building a strategic plan and connecting with other Christians who shared the same passions; it talked about being a contagious Christian and bringing others along with me. What I realized is that I really struggle with that. I have been fortunate to be blessed with so much Christian community, but when it comes down to it, I still have strong tendencies to be a solo-Christian, just me & God. I have strong convictions, but too often instead of sharing those, I live them out on my own. As I was preparing to leave Columbia, I realized how much I didn't bring others along with me - at work, at church, with community stuff; so much of the stuff that I did, I did alone, just me. Instead of involving others, I get so focused on what I am doing. God is showing me that's not what He wants. He wants US to be the church, to work together, to edify each other, to partner together for His kingdom.
I am excited about being at a Christian university, one that takes its Christian mission seriously. I am excited about discovering what it is like to connect with others who share the same passions and convictions. I am excited about finding a church here and seeking out those who have different gifts than me. I am excited to see what God has to teach me about serving, about humility, about being a part of His body and His team.
I have a feeling those will be some hard lessons for me. As I look back, though, on the Christian community that He has blessed me with, wonderful church family in place after place, I think of how sweet it is to be in that fellowship and that community. How much greater it will be to deepen those bonds and to be useful together with others in service to Christ and to the world.
I guess it would be easy to say I moved for work. I accepted a new position at Baylor University. It's true, that is the impetus, but really the reason goes deeper. I feel called to be here. I'm not sure why, but over the last several months, as I prayed, though, talked through this decision, I really have sensed God leading me here. I'm not sure what God has in store for me here. I do think part of it is the job. I have a passion for students and teaching and investing in the lives of young people. And I so want to be salt and light, to make a difference in their lives for Christ, to help them discover God's purpose and His plans for their lives.
But I also think I am here for me, that I need to be here. Last year, I started reading a book called "Holy Ambition" and it talked about wanting to do great things for God. It was an incredibly powerful and poignant book based on Nehemiah. And about four or five chapters in, I stonewalled. I couldn't do anything else with the book. It talked about building a strategic plan and connecting with other Christians who shared the same passions; it talked about being a contagious Christian and bringing others along with me. What I realized is that I really struggle with that. I have been fortunate to be blessed with so much Christian community, but when it comes down to it, I still have strong tendencies to be a solo-Christian, just me & God. I have strong convictions, but too often instead of sharing those, I live them out on my own. As I was preparing to leave Columbia, I realized how much I didn't bring others along with me - at work, at church, with community stuff; so much of the stuff that I did, I did alone, just me. Instead of involving others, I get so focused on what I am doing. God is showing me that's not what He wants. He wants US to be the church, to work together, to edify each other, to partner together for His kingdom.
I am excited about being at a Christian university, one that takes its Christian mission seriously. I am excited about discovering what it is like to connect with others who share the same passions and convictions. I am excited about finding a church here and seeking out those who have different gifts than me. I am excited to see what God has to teach me about serving, about humility, about being a part of His body and His team.
I have a feeling those will be some hard lessons for me. As I look back, though, on the Christian community that He has blessed me with, wonderful church family in place after place, I think of how sweet it is to be in that fellowship and that community. How much greater it will be to deepen those bonds and to be useful together with others in service to Christ and to the world.
Monday, January 31, 2011
Stopping Short & Going Long
In my last blog, I talked about the tortoise and the need to consistently move forward. Sometimes, though, we run into detours, and such has been my training this time around. Instead of moving forward, I have been “stuck” at maintaining and struggling to get in my weekly runs, much less my 3x a week scheduled ones. My cross-training has been suffering, as I haven’t hit the gym much lately either. As happens from time to time, life gets in the way.
I recently accepted a new position at Baylor University and will be moving to Texas in a month. My training schedule has given way to packing and to-do lists, quality time with friends and family, closing one chapter of my life and preparing to begin another.
And so, in some ways, I accept defeat. I am stopping short of my goal, officially changing my registration from the half-marathon to the 5K, the same weekend. I am still, though, running with our team and still supporting Samaritan’s Purse. I just can’t finish the training and build the miles for the half while doing what I need to do to transition. As I struggled with the decision, I felt disappointed in myself and my lack of follow through. It bothers me not to finish what I started.
But while I am stopping short of this goal, the half, I am also thinking about going long, thinking long-term about how I can continue to support Samaritan’s Purse, how I can cultivate Christ-like compassion in my life, about how I can make a difference in the lives of those around me. I want to go the distance when it comes to caring and encouraging others to care about those in need around the world. I want to write, to share, to give generously to organizations like SP that are there long-term, meeting needs and changing lives in the name of Christ.
I hope to team up with Carolyn and all again in the future, and tackle a half successfully. In the meantime, I still choose to run with purpose and want to finish well.
If you missed the article Brett Welsh wrote in the Columbia College Postscript, check it out here:
It’s not too late to support our team. Go to our team website to donate:
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